SMiLEY MaDness

Are people born Wicked?

2012-01-19T18:35:00.003+08:00

I. AM GOING. TO SIT. AND WATCH. WICKED. THIS SUNDAY. IN A THEATRE. AND EVERYTHING.

*

It's a bucket list thing, people. So there is no way I could express how excited I am about it. "I'm excited. Like, really really" doesn't quite do it justice, but it's all I got for y'all at the moment.

So any kid stories today, you ask? (I know you didn't but like the situation above, it's all I got at the moment.)

I think they all finally know my name now, and those who are still confused call me "teacher". Which, you know. I'm NOT. Not really. But hey, whatever helps them. Pretty hectic day today. The pain in my back (and also my ass, but maybe that has nothing to do with anything) tells me I needed to sit down more than I got to today, but issall good. As long as you're happy with the work you did. Which I am.

HOW DO YOU DEAL WITH A LITTLE BOY WHO WON'T STOP YELLING OUT THE WORD 'VAGINA' DURING "SILENT READING TIME?"

Threaten him. That's what I did, muahahaha. And I had full support from the teacher, so BAHAHAHAHAHA.

And tomorrow's the start of "Turtle Week", so we all get to wear green and donate to WWF to save the endangered turtles.

Man, this job is so much fun.

ALSO, I had an entire conversation about The Avengers with one of the boys in class. What I discuss in a week with these kids interests me more than what I've been doing for the past 3 years, pffffft.

Life.

(YES they're all Toby gifs. DEAL.)

* (I wish I made the first gif but I didn't and I don't know who did but whoever you are I'm pretty sure I love you so thank you.)

They Try To Trick Me. Like, ALL The Time.

2012-01-12T18:50:00.003+08:00

So, getting into the groove of the workplace! And these kids- sheesh. Too cute, too cute. I'm sure people following me on Twitter are ready to kill me, because my account has become a daily "what happened at work today" kinda thing. To be fair, you had to be there to absorb the hilarity of the situation, but I try to make it work. I doo eet fer yooh.

But I'm liking it so far. Everyday there's a story to tell. Just today, 2 Scandinavian girls tried to scam me outta 20 bucks. Angelic faces, but woohoohoo, watch out. And the other day I was on recess duty and two little boys came up to me and said:

"Excuse me? That boy over there? He...he came up to us and said that our favourite colour....is PINK....and we told him NO IT WASN'T but he still says that we like PINK."

And they look up at me with the saddest faces evar.

By the time I walked over to where they were pointing, the bully had run away, so I had to tell them that if anyone was mean to them again they should come see me and they nodded earnestly and said "OK!" before running off.

And then there was that one time where I had like a half hour long conversation with a boy about Bigfoot.

You just wanna squish all of them with LURVE.

Aaanyway.

OH YEAH, IT'S MAH BURFDAY TODAY.

Alhamdulillah, I feel truly blessed that I made it this far without being tooooo tooooo screwed up. I mean, you know. I have issues. But we all do. My cat is licking my jeans. Wait, what.

No.

Thank you?

Yes.

...what was I talking about?...

I don't care if I'm overreacting!!!!!

2011-12-27T14:23:00.008+08:00

So, for fun....

BUT THEN!

AND THEN!!!!

Homaigawd.

MADE MY DAY.

Thanks, Andrew :) Check out his channel: GUNNAROLLA

PS: AND THENNNNN!!!!

ASDFGHJJKL;

COFFEE CHALLENGE ACCEPTED! ...and failed. Again.

2011-12-22T02:51:00.005+08:00

It's almost 3 in the AM and I'm still not asleep. Now, normally, it would be because I'm working on something, or finishing up whatever needs to be done, or something's happening in the near future that is bringing on the nervous sweats and the terrifying what-if thoughts.

But nope.

I got nothing.

None of that.

Just plain ol' insomnia.

OR....

MAYBE....

I had coffee earlier.

Teehee.

Look, it's one of those mysteries in life, OK. My brain cannot compute the fact that coffee=no sleep. It's like a demented sort of challenge in which I convince myself that I can beat the effects of coffee. And yeah, I fail everytime. It's just something I do, OK? BECAUSE OF REASONS.

Remember when I said I'd start blogging regularly again once I regain some sort of balance in my life? Yeah, no, that hasn't happened. So I don't know if I can keep that promise. But I mean, I like blogging- kinda hard to imagine me just stopping. It's not about having people read any of it, it's just getting it out, you know? (...Said like a true un-famous person on the interwebz.)

Also, it's past 3 now, and I'm getting kinda paranoid....so I'll go back to bed. Not to sleep. Just to...lay...in the darkness. *facepalm*

AND DANGNABBIT, NO MORE COFFEE FOR ME.

NO, REALLY, I MEAN IT THIS TIME.

SERIOUSLY. NO MORE.

.....YEAH.

(P.S: If you know who that is, I bestow upon you the highest of fives.)

Back To School

2011-12-17T16:34:00.003+08:00

So yesterday was my final day of "training week" at my new job, and it ended on a good note. I mean, it left me exhausted and I was sleeping at 9/10pm everyday that week, but I think it was worth it. I hope the worst is over and that my body has gotten used to it. Of course, there's a 3 week gap before I start again...so...yup. Hopes were JUST dashed.

Oh well.

Joking aside, I loved it. The kids I work with are precious- and it's not that I'm naive enough to hope it'll always be like it was the week I was there, but for an introduction, it was perfect. And the school? Man, it reminded me WHY I loved my school years so much. Well, you know. Up until like the last 2 years of high school, when all the angst starting settling in. Let's skip those years, shall we. Like so many do.

Also, I don't think I've ever had so much X-mas related food in my whole life. It was like everyday was a party, and I had my fill of cookies and cake and cupcakes and cheese and cream and whatever else "THE MOMS" saw fit to bring.

Also, I thought I was the "nenek glamour", but dude. I totally met a real life one. She was tall, had a rockin' bod, bright red lipstick, beautiful white-blonde hair up in a do, and the dress with the lowest neckline I've ever seen. She was fabulous. I may have stared, but I tried hard to make it subtle. Which is hard to do when it comes to staring anyway.

Also, the names these kids have? Let's just say, if you ever need suggestions for soap-opera names, I got you covered. It just feels SO good to say them out loud. Is that weird? (Probably.)

I get to teach Math (among other things), which is worrisome, but shhh, don't tell anyone.

Some need help focusing, but I love listening to them talk, to the point that I lose focus, and have to remind them to continue with their work. Example:

Me: Alright, so do you know which answer goes in this box?
Kid: Yeah, it's number one.
Me: Good job, OK, all you need to do is copy the sentence.
Kid: *writes one word* Did you know the short form for Christmas is X-mas? It's spelled X,M........A......S!
Me: Wow! OK, that's great, now we need to finish this box, OK?
Kid: OK. *writes one word* I'm going to Melbourne for the holidays that's where I'm from not my mother she's from England London England that's in England and then she brought a gingerbread house and I got to punch it and knock it down I knocked down the entire wall the back wall and there were pieces flying everywhere and

*BELL RINGS*

Ain't that great?! Hahahahaha.

Aaaanyway. I'll let you know when I have to deal with my first "tantrum case". Came pretty close a few times, but somehow those situations were avoided...I think because they were all in a good mood anyway- "pre-holiday cheer".

But yesterday when I was on the field during recess, the kids were lining up to go back to their classes, and one of the little girls I was working with that morning came up to me and gave me a tight hug, then she grabbed my hand and we walked back to class together- and yeah, I almost cried.

BECAUSE IT WAS SO SWEET.

GAHHHHHH.

I love when people are nice.

ALSO, YASMINA HAS GIVEN BIRTH TO A BABY BOY THIS MORNING. CAN YOU BELIEVE IT. DIDN'T WE JUST MEET LIKE, YESTERDAY?! WEREN'T WE ALL TEENAGERS LIKE, YESTERDAY?! AAARRRGGGGHHHHHHH. SO MUCH LOVE. I'M COMING YAAR! THAT BABY BETTER LIKE HIS AUNTIE FARAH! I'LL FORCE HIM TO LIKE ME IF HE DOESN'T! I DON'T CARE IF THAT'S IMMORAL/UNETHICAL/WEIRD!

Decreasing Numbers. Nobody Cares. I Care...A Little.

2011-12-10T10:28:00.004+08:00

► 2010 (79)

► 2009 (123)

► 2008 (126)

► 2007 (138)

► 2006 (102)

► 2005 (1)

Know what those are? Every year since I've started this blog thing, and the number of blogposts in said year. Disregard 2005, coz I wrote my first blog post on New Year's Eve. Coz I'm speshul lyke dat. Wanna know what this year's stats are?

► 2011 (47)

GAHHHHH. FAIL.

Really, I try. But looking back on all my rant posts, I've decided that I don't want them to overtake this place. I mean, come on! It's the abode of the Smiley! Shouldn't it be..."happier"? And less "psychotic bitch"? I'd even let "creepy stalker" me take over. At least she's fun.

So yes. Once I get everything balanced out (I got a new job, people! I'm sure you don't care, but I'm excited, wheeee!), I'll try to get back into documenting meaningless life facts for whoever is still interested.

Diseased Children Made Me Do It.

2011-11-03T15:26:00.009+08:00

I tried, really really really really hard, not to ever write this post, because it feels like I'm just taking out my anger on some poor, unfortunate souls (I've been made to watch The Little Mermaid 64325435 times while babysitting these past few weeks), but I feel like at some point, I'm gonna have to let it out.

This is that point. I'll be as polite as I can.

OK.

I get that I am prooooobably not the type of person that people strive to be- let's not take into account the stuff that makes its way onto this blog, but I'm just sayin', in person: I like to keep things to myself, I don't usually want to tell anybody anything that I think is personal ('cause that would be defeating the purpose, right? Makes sense to me, but some people just like to push, geez), if you want advice I'll tell you straight out I have no right to tell you what to do but will tell you what I'd do in that situation, new things/people intimidate me, and although I love my TV shows, I do NOT like drama in real life- if drama rears its head, I am very, very weary of it.

Voila. "ME" is a bunch of "BLAH" to many, many people I know, based on their personalities. I get that people are different, and that I shouldn't expect everyone to think like me, but GODDAMNIT. You'd think that basic common sense would be more prevalent- you'd REALLY like to think that people can't be THAT ignorant and selfish, but here they are, proving you wrong:

1. Drama Queens

Drama is exciting, drama adds 'oomph', drama gets you all the attention. I get it. We all have drama in our lives- but it's how you deal with it that projects the sort of person you are. Drama Queens can be fun! The ones that live life with passion, encouraging people to do the same- they can serve as motivation; I'm sure you've had one or two change your life for the better, don't even lie. But the ones who go out of their way to create drama, to MAKE SURE that EVERYONE knows THEY need MORE MORE MORE attention.....GTFO, and sort out your priorities in life.

2. Rule-Breakers

So you're unique, you live your life the way YOU want it, nobody tells you what to do because you already KNOW what to do and HOW to do it. Well, yay! It doesn't sound so bad when I put it like that. Very empowering, yes yes yes. Ahhh, but then there are times when people like this can't do it alone, and they need help, but (God knows why) they see this as a weakness. So how do they solve this problem? They don't like to think so, but their reputation is everything to them. They loooove the fact that they're 'different', so much so, that they don't realize nobody actually takes them seriously anymore. And yet, they want to interact with people. So listen here, people-of-this-category: there are people willing to help you if you ask them for it (and seriously, be nice about it), but then your ego takes over and you forget that you were only able to do whatever it is you needed done because OTHER PEOPLE HELPED YOU WITH IT. So give credit where credit's due, and people (like me) won't dislike you so much.

3. The Preachers

Not necessarily talking bout religion here, but we all need that little push to remind us of what we should or shouldn't be doing. And I am good with that, I support it wholeheartedly. But there is a reason why not everyone can be in the business of preaching good to the masses. There is a method to it- an art, if you will. Just shoving it in people's faces will not make them respect you. The ferocity with which they do it....hurts. I can't think of a better word. It just hurts. Somewhere, inside the body, you will feel pain. Whether it annoys you, angers you or saddens you, that 'special' pain will make itself known. So, you know. Stop it.

All y'all. Just stop. Pretty, pretty please.

Aaaaand that's all I needed to get off my chest.

I don't like to be angry. It takes up too much time and energy that I could've used for something else, something more positive. But we're all only human, and I don't really hate anybody ('cept maybe Miley. I just DO, ok). We will always have our faults.

So this *points to all the bitching* is my weakness (one of MANY).

*edit* Sorry for the "bandwith exceeded" crap. They were meant to be gifs expressing my feeeelings, but Photobucket's being an asshole.

THIS.

2011-11-01T00:07:00.002+08:00

The Librarian Obviously Hates Me. That HURTS.

2011-10-17T11:57:00.005+08:00

Maybe being in Singapore is fuel to my weird-dreams fire because guuuurrlllll, there have been so many since I've been here. I haven't blogged about them because...OK, honestly, I don't remember them. But I know they were weird and I know there were many. But I wrote this one down, so:

WEIRD DREAM POST!

I'm in a library! Books, books and more books! Like the one in Beauty and The Beast! WOOHOOOOO! But what am I there for?

....a comic book. A Japanese comic book. Specifically, no.2 of the series. Don't ask me what it's called; apparently only "dream-me" can read Japanese.

So I'm haunting the shelves, looking for this comic. I finally find the shelf it's supposed to be on, but I'm scanning, scanning, scanning...and no.2 isn't there. WELL, DAMMIT. But then I take a closer look at the shelf, and I see something peeking out from behind the row of comic books- like you know how sometimes at a bookstore, you find a book you like and there's only one copy but you can't afford to buy it yet so you try your best to hide it so only you can find it when you can afford it? (I sincerely hope I'm not the only one who does this.)

Yeah. Like that. Only at a library. And someone hid stacks and stacks of books behind this particular row of comics. So there I am, pulling them off the shelf so I can get a better look at the hidden books, when all of a sudden a shadow looms over me. I look up and

Professor McGonagall (...from Harry Potter...although if you don't know who that is...*sigh*...) is staring down at me. Tall pointy hat and everything. Which would've been awesome if I wasn't so scared. I feel I owe her an explanation, because I am suddenly aware that she happens to be the librarian...so:

"Uh....*nervous giggle*..I'm just...looking for no.2...doesn't seem to... *cough*...be...here. Do you....maybe...know...where it is? Maybe? Possibly?...Help?"

and she looks down at me and says: ".....fuck off."

Which, again. Would've been kinda awesome. If I wasn't so taken aback. Professor McGonagall is a freaking bitch.

But as she struts away and I'm cursing away under my breath, someone's laughing behind me, and I turn around, bitch-face ready, when I find myself face to face with Adam Scott. If you don't know the name, IMDB it- I'm sure you'll know the face.

Aaaaanyway. There he was. Mr. Rooks, haha. And I'm not even sure if he was a teacher, a student, some random guy who hangs out at libraries....but it's Adam Scott. It doesn't even matter. So of course we magically end up in my room.

Pshhh, yeah you WISH something happened (*cough* as do I.) But nothing did. We hung out on my bed (WHICH WAS ROUND, BY THE WAY, WTF), and a discussion about "pearl underwear" came up (I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS), and suddenly

we hear the front door slam shut and I look at Adam and say: "Dad's home."

He gives me a look of panic and he jumps up and starts babbling away about how he has to get the hell outta here when my bedroom door flies inside the room after being kicked open by

Hulk Hogan.

And Mr. Hogan comes in (roaring. Actually roaring.) and makes his way to Adam, picks him up by the collar.....

THE END.

I know right?! WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED AFTER THAT?!

AAAAARRRGGGHHHHHH.

Well of COURSE it was gonna stay RED.

2011-10-15T21:18:00.006+08:00

Hope it brightens things up a bit; less black, more white, even more red.

My photobucket decided to spazz on me and not show my gifs, so in the process of fixing that, I ended up giving the whole blog a facelift.

Not a big one, just bits and pieces.

Unfortunately I don't have anything worth blogging about besides this at the moment....well, no, that's a lie. I just can't sit down and write out a post that would mean anything to me right now, but soon, I'm hoping to fill these pages with crap again.

Crap makes the world go 'round!

......yeah, no, it's OK. I didn't get that either.

Make Me Laugh, Make Me Cry

2011-09-27T01:31:00.009+08:00

I recently acquired all 7 seasons of Boy Meets World. Remember that show? I know you remember Topanga. Nobody forgets a name like Topanga, come on. From a time when TV for kids was smart without compromising the FUN. Most of the credit goes to the (imho) genius writers, but without the perfect cast? It wouldn't have all come together as flawlessly as it did.

As the work I need to finish calls out to me in a voice I imagine to be filled with agony and desperation, I promptly ignore it to embark on a Boy Meets World Marathon. Sure, I'll regret it. But not a lot.

Because as a TV addict, you have to know exactly what to watch to make you feel better. So right now, smack-dab in the middle of Fall TV season- the TV addict's heaven- I feel the need to put all my shows on the back burner while I finish watching Boy Meets World.

....well, I have to watch Doctor Who. Mostly because it's awesome and I can't ever leave it alone. But also because it's ending while most are starting (finale's next week. BOO.)

But back to Boy Meets World.

Cory and the gang. This show. These characters. GAHHHHHHHH.

Maybe it's being able to watch them grow from being little kids to young adults. Watching these characters live. Watch them laugh, watch them cry. Watch them being harassed by Mr. Feeny, only to find out he was helping them make the right decision.

I don't know if it's just me being emotionally unstable right now, but watching Cory and Topanga's love bloom? Oh man. In addition to making me feel extremely, intensely, severely FOREVER ALONE-ish...it also causes my heart a lot of pain. Because it makes you wonder if such a love exists in reality.

Or if I'll ever be lucky enough to have even a little bit of that action.

But mostly because you get to actually see the characters go from this

to this.

I mean, COME ON. If you didn't go "awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww" at that, you are a heartless, heartless person. Dead on the inside. Empty, I tell ya, EMPTY!

Cory+Topanga 4EVA.

And may we all find our own Cory/Topanga.

Not a good start today.

2011-09-17T14:08:00.001+08:00

Some people.

Sleazy Bag O' Douche.

2011-09-16T18:27:00.006+08:00

I should be the last person in the world talking about sleaze. (Hi, obsessed with celebrities and pop culture, how ya doin', nice to meet-cha.)

Here's the thing though, at least for me personally. You see all the weird goings-on on your TV set and you hear about it from people, so you laugh and think "That's ridiculous. I can't believe anyone would do/say that!"

Of course, then you actually meet a perfect embodiment of sleaze and douchebaggery, and all I can do when faced with such a situation (after seething a bit) is wonder how people like that function in the world. Unfortunately, they're usually high up on the power ladder. But that just means it's even more frustrating when they're NOT.

So you're good-looking (subjective, though).

So you've got a good job (assuming you're not lying/exaggerating about it).

So you're intelligent enough to (occasionally) get out a decent sentence, devoid of any grammatical mistakes (.....very, very occasionally).

Dude, you're still a douchebag.

(can you tell this is personal yet?...)

They usually pride themselves on being honest, being "real", and are just "telling it how it is."

Yeaaaaaaah, no.

DOUCHEBAG. Clear as day.

Sorry.

But backing up a totally insensitive/cruel/blasphemous/heartless statement or comment by adding "I'm just being myself, other people can suck it!" (or the equivalent) does not and WILL not (EVER) make people admire you and think highly of you. And you can argue, as they so often do, that it's not your goal in life to have people think highly of you, or that you have better things to worry about.

There is a difference between expressing your opinion, and spewing out shit for the hell of it without having any sort of intelligent explanation, hoping that someone somewhere will agree with you. A very big difference.

And I'm not saying I'm always rational when it comes to expressing an opinion. Take my ...let's call it "disdain"...for Miley Cyrus. Irrational, for sure. And anyone reading what I've said about her (jokingly or otherwise) would think I'm a horrible, horrible person, and I wouldn't say anything against it. But do I actually wish her any physical harm? No, of course not, I don't wish that on anyone. No matter how annoying.

You can choose to believe me or say I'm full of crap- it doesn't matter. My point is (...fine, not gonna lie, I lost my train of thought somewhere in the middle of the above paragraph. Writing on the spot doesn't always make sense, OK? Especially when it's for cathartic purposes.) ....we all have our own ways of viewing the world as it is presented before us. And I suppose nobody really has the right to tell you what you should or shouldn't be doing/saying.

But.

I will judge you if you go around thinking your words are the epitome of wit when in fact they just emphasize your ignorance about what it means to be a good person, in the most basic sense of the term.

Just...try to be good, ok? You don't have to be perfect, because nobody can be that. You don't have to be a saint. But when you stop trying to be good, you stop realizing the bad things you do/say are actually, truly "bad"; then I think you're in trouble. You gotta have that gauge, you know?

That's that.

It's one of those roundabout arguments- You judge, I judge, we all judge, we all win, we all lose.

Blah blah blah again.

Til the next blah blah blah! Be good!

Checking stats coz I'm bored.

2011-09-08T17:48:00.002+08:00

You bunch of stalkers, you. I love y'all.

Seriously though, are you here for the gifs? You can't be here for the stories.

Oh wait, that's right, random Google searches led you here.

To those who stayed, thank you. To those who cursed Google for disappointing you- errr, sorry.

To those who clicked on a link because they were curious....well, now you know.

Love it, hate it, have no strong feelings either way- doesn't matter, still counts.

Thanks for stopping by!

Parents. Like, seriously.

2011-09-05T16:38:00.004+08:00

And I mean that in a good way.

It's weird how most of the time we get such joy out of sharing stories where they just baffle us with their seemingly ridiculous notions of life that obviously do NOT benefit us at all. Weird and fun, don't deny it.

But there are other stories too.

Stories of how they happen to be the only people who understand what you're going through.

Stories of how they save our lives, over and over again.

Stories of how they prove, repeatedly, that no matter how hard and far you fall, they will help you back up, in one way or another.

I know there are those who don't have any of the above, and that just reminds me that I am grateful I do.

I don't usually share those stories, but that's just because I'm.. ME- no talky-talky bout the feeeeeelings until it gets to the point where I can't hold it in anymore, haha.

But I like holding these stories in. They're mine, they're awesome, and I want to keep them to myself.

So...really, there's no point to this post.

I'm....sorry?

*awkward silence*

I'm just sayin'.

Parents can be cool if you give them a chance to be.

OH AND I GOT A NEW TV. (Nothing to do with anything, but still awesome.)

Scenes from my Raya, 2011

2011-09-04T20:17:00.003+08:00

Hope y'all had a blessed Eid!

Trip North

2011-08-29T04:12:00.002+08:00

About to drive the 'normally-4-hours-but-I-have-a-feeling-it's-gonna-be-6-hours-this-time' to the land of paddy fields

so I'm gonna take the time now to

wish all my Muslim peeps a Selamat Hari Raya, have a blessed Eid, forgive all my wrong-doings towards you, have a great one!

and to all my Malaysian peeps, Happy Independence Day, MERDEKA MERDEKA MERDEKA!

Alright y'all!

Have fun!

Be good!

Bye!

Quick Update Of THE LIST

2011-08-24T19:19:00.006+08:00

1) Paul Iacono - From MTV's The Hard Times of RJ Berger. Sadly...it just got canceled. BOO.

2) Brett Davern - From MTV's 'Awkward'. Which of course sucked me in with the title. And there he was, all blonde and cute and goofy.

3) Aidan Turner - from BBC's 'Being Human'. Um..well. Look at him.

4) Robert Sheehan - from 'Misfits', but I guess he's moving on to bigger and better things. Which is a-ok by me. His character has got to be the biggest asshole you've ever seen..but somehow he brings a charming quality to it, haha. Gotta see it to know it.

~~~

Ahhh, gifs. Making me feel like I've accomplished something since...last year or so.

A coupla MTV cuties, a coupla Irish lads.

Gotta love the TV when it presents you with specimens such as these.

Number two strays from the type, but only in terms of..err, being blonde. He's wonderfully awkward, so issall good.

This has been an 'appreciation of beauty' post.

Ramadhan and Twittah

2011-08-15T12:51:00.006+08:00

Procrastinating, blah blah blah you know the drill. Let's get on with it.

Mini Weird Dream Post!

I'm on a BOAT! ...well, OK, a ship, but The Lonely Island didn't write that one. Aaaanyhoo. It's a crowded ship, and it's already dark out so I'm thinking "Oh, must be time to buka puasa (break fast)." So I find a queue and just assume it's leading to food, and I get in line. Suddenly people are pushing and shoving, and I turn around to cuss some people out when there's a bright light and it feels like someone switched on a fan and directed it in my face, and as I'm wondering what the hell is going on.....

I see Freida Pinto walking towards me, all glorious and beautiful and smiley.

HOT DAYUM she's gorgeous.

And she comes up to me and says "Jom buka puasa." And I say...

"Uh..OK."

And as she walks away, I whip out my phone and text Yasmina, my Inspector: "Raju. Wish you were here to show me how to eat the food of your countrymen." (I remember it word for word because it's hilarious, considering our friendship and the gist of all our inside jokes and conversations.)

HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAA THE END.

If you're not following me on Twitter then you're missing out on a lot of weirdness. I won't promise it's funny or interesting. Just weird. And sometimes creepy. But the point is that I use it everyday, so it really is a mini-blog of sorts. So...yeah. Get on that. If you feel like it.

The 140 character limit is crippling sometimes, but that just encourages me to spam your timeline if one tweet isn't enough. Coz I'm persistent like that.

Some may confuse 'persistent' with 'annoying'.

Nuance.

I did share a story recently on there that will bring joy to those who love to see me be humiliated.

I was at Sunway Pyramid recently with my brother's family, and it was almost time to break our fast, so we were sitting at Burger King, waiting to eat. By the way, don't you love how during Ramadhan, when you go out, you have that bond with the strangers around you when you're counting down the minutes to Maghrib? The eye contact...waiting to see who'll eat first...the tension in the air.... it's hilarious.

Anyway.

We were waiting to see if they would play the azan, because it's not really tradition in my family to break our fast outside- we're homely people. Plus, WHY, when we've got Mama's cooking?!- I don't really know how they do it on the outside. I know some restaurants announce it, or play it over the speakers... I know it was Burger King, but still...I had no idea what the procedure was. So I was still hoping for an azan. But with the atmosphere being so noisy, and the mall playing music over the loudspeakers, it was hard to hear anything that was going on around you. I was still on edge though, because according to my iPhone app it was 2 minutes away from Maghrib, and everyone was starting to look panicky (including the cute guy at the next table, but let's not get into that. *cough* Damn, he was cute though. And I did get a smile outta him eventually. Life=made.) Suddenly, I heard a melodious male voice floating out from the loudspeakers and I poked my brother repeatedly on the shoulder, hissing "Wei wei wei wei wei dah azan wei!"

My brother listened intently for a few seconds with a hopeful look on his face....which slowly gave way to a look of incredulity and joy (at having the chance to torture me) and said:

"WOI. That's R.Kelly. 'I Believe I Can Fly.' HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAA!"

.........this is my life, people.

Talking To Myself Again.

2011-08-09T01:46:00.006+08:00

Thought I'd abandoned the blog, didn't ya?

...see, the opening sentence just proved the legitimacy of the blog post title. Hey, at least I'm being honest.

Another confession is that I did recently buy a new journal, as in one of those huge ass notebooks. The ones made of paper. That you write in. With pens. And pencils. You know, pencils, those things that...ah nevermind. I'm old fashioned, OK.

I also consumed a large mug of coffee a coupla hours ago, and while it keeps me awake, it does nothing to energize me enough to provide motivation to do anything academic. As usual. Seriously, when will I learn. I wonder if it's because I have this idea in my head that coffee is some magical liquid, the elixir of wonder to students everywhere...and even though, from the very first time I downed a cuppa to "stay up all night" so I could "study", it has never ever ever worked in my favour.... and yet I keep doing it. Maybe I'm an optimist. As in "Hey, who knows, if I try it enough times, maybe, when I need it the most, it'll work!"

...my brain.

Forever a mystery.

And not even in that good way.

Let's not get into that dream I had about slapping Zac Efron and him blubbering on about how he's the leader of the gang and that I shouldn't treat him that way....you know what, nevermind. Long story, and you won't feel any smarter after hearing it. May even kill some brain cells for all I know. I'd write it out in a 'weird dream post', but it's been days since I had it and distortions are starting to set in, so if it was weird before, it's REALLY weird now, haha. 'Til, the next one, eh?

I know this post has mostly been random spew, but in all honesty, it's cathartic. Being the month of Ramadhan, personally I feel like whatever emotions that had been running high leading up to it finally settles in, and everything culminates in this holy month to a point where I have to meet them head on. In any other month, that would be a scary thing. But in Ramadhan...well. You have Allah on your side. Even more than usual. Which is always. So it's a pretty good deal.

Another thing about Ramadhan (that doesn't feel all that great, but it's doing more good than I probably know) is that I'm more aware of all my flaws. I can be vapid, yes. Shallow. Mean. Insincere. Judgemental. All those things and more (...let's not list them ALL..I mean..it's 2.10AM and I'm still awake, do I really need to feel more depressed about myself? No. No I don't.). So I'm just gonna lay it out here and say that I know I can be all those things...but everyday I try not to be. And that's got to count for something.

I didn't make a post on the first day of Ramadhan like I planned to, and I don't know how many of my friends and acquaintances even visit this little dot in cyberspace that is my blog, but let me take this opportunity to apologize for anything I've ever done to hurt you, physically or otherwise, intentionally and unintentionally. May I never do anything to make you feel less-than-good ever again! ....I...LOVE YOU...?

...damn, I just had to make it awkward, didn't I.

It's how I roll.

Kinda proud of it. I mean, awkwardness is a redeeming feature, I think. It's great to be super confident and not care about what the world thinks about you... but nobody's like that all the time. Nobody's perfect. When your 'awkward' is showing, you're sharing who you are with the world. It may not be pretty. But it is, without a doubt, YOU. Shouldn't that be a good thing?

...OR MAYBE I'M JUST TRYING TO MAKE MY AWKWARD SELF FEEL BETTER.

This has been a long ass blog post.

2011-07-17T04:43:00.003+08:00

"Supposing you have tried and failed again and again. You may have a fresh start any moment you choose, for this thing we call "failure" is not the falling down, but the staying down."

-Mary Pickford

Prepubescence. That's a word, right?

2011-07-07T21:34:00.008+08:00

Procrastination time, awwyeahhh.

Let's start off with a new obsession, shall we. Also because I feel the need to explain the gross tweets that could be mistaken as me being a pedophile.

It's not that. Really. Don't get me arrested, ok? I just think they're so cute and I wanna hug them all and make sure they're never sad and if, IF they happen to be hot when they turn 18....well then. I'll be making another 'obsessions' post, won't I.

I know it ended forever ago, but Season 6 of ABDC (America's Best Dance Crew) is the reason for this confusion. The way I like to watch ABDC is to watch it as a marathon, so I don't follow it week to week. There aren't a lot of eps every season anyway, and watching them all back-to-back is just so much cooler.

This season they made history with the youngest crew ever to join and GOSHDARNIT aren't they cute (yes, yes they are). And they made it all the way to the finals too, and yeah, they have a lot of haters because of it, but the people voted for them. The people enjoy them. I personally don't think that they were the BEST dancers out of all the crews in the competition, but they were definitely the most popular.

AND THEY'RE JUST SO ADORABLE, OHMYGOSH.

I really don't know how to gush about them without sounding like a lovesick prepubescent being, so I'm just gonna leave a video and you can just go "Awwwwwwww"/ "HOLY#$%@#$% thatwasawesome" and/or both.

Plus...they're kids. They like to joke around. They'll make you laugh and melt your hearts; how is this a bad thing? :D

On to other things. So I know Facebook is kinda on its way to being obsolete, but I was reminded of the way things used to be (a.k.a a coupla years ago) (geez, time flies) when it got me all hot and bothered over the fact that it made it so simple for past classmates from around the world to reconnect.

And just last week, I was able to meet up with kids from my Kindergarten! That's almost 2 decades of not seeing each other. WHAT THE HELL HOW AWESOME IS THAT. And I know, I know I still have to meet up with highschool friends, and middle school friends, but these were friends from kindergarten. Like.....KINDERGARTEN. From back when we were in a land where 'kindergarten' actually, literally means something, haha. (It's German, fyi, and we were in Austria.) Being the socially awkward person that I am, I was too nervous to even think properly, but it ended up being a really great night.

Which subsequently led me to dig through old photo albums and post some pics of us on Facebook (see? Linkage. Boom.) and as of right now we managed to track down and tag most of the people in those photos.

Reminisce, reconnect, WIN.

Such a great feeling. :) So again....THANK YOU, FACEBOOK.

That's pretty much it. 'Til next time.

Don't forget to check out the ICONIC BOYZ on YouTube, they're going places. Right guys?

Creys.

2011-07-01T14:57:00.004+08:00

Dream post! Usually I'd call it a Weird Dream post, but damn. This was a scary one. I can't even remember the last time I had a nightmare- usually they're just weird and 'WTF' inducing, but overall, pretty fun....

The one I had last night was...hm. Well, let's just say it had a strong enough impact on me that I can still remember it now, and it's like 3pm already.

Started off with me in a hospital bed, and I think I just gave birth or something, haha. But there's no baby, only talk of a baby, and I have that feeling of 'Man, having a baby is hard.' (No duh. Mothers around the world would roll their eyes at me.)

But anyway. Suddenly people around me start panicking, and everything goes dark but when the lights come back on, I'm in a car. It's night-time, and suddenly..my phone rings. The driver up front looks back at me and says: "Don't. It's a trap."

Well.
SHIT.
Now I'm scared.

I must've had one of my 'dumbass' moments, because I answered anyway....

and it was my brother. But I knew it wasn't really him. Just something pretending to be him. But as scared as I was, I just went along with it, and he gave me an address, telling me to meet him there, and the rest of my family was there too.

The driver and I end up at the address, which is a Thai restaurant. We don't get out of the car, because it's pitch black out, and I'm almost peeing my pants in fear.

I turn to look out the window

AND THERE'S A FACE GRINNING BACK AT ME.

OMGHEARTATTACK.

SCARY GILER- and right away I knew it was obviously a vampire. Asian vampires. According to Glee, the worst kind. And I think I believe it now.

The driver slams his foot down on the gas pedal and we're speeding away, but the vampires are somehow just hanging on to the windows, grinning at me (nak nangiiiis takuuuuut).

I just close my eyes and hope for the best, and somehow, when I open them again, daylight is streaming in through the windows, and no vampires are to be found.

I'm so relieved, you have no idea. But then I remember my family, and I'm wondering what happened to them- I tell the driver to take me home. As we pull up to the driveway, I see something on the ground, so I get out of the car and take a closer look.....

And it's Babu. He's all hollowed out and bloody- the vampires got him.

I think I just spent the rest of the dream crying my eyes out over his limp body.

THE END.

Probably the worst dream I've ever had. BABU, I LOVE YOUUUUUU, I'M SO SORRY I MAKE FUN OF YOU ALL THE TIME.

...not that he can read this or anything because...he's a cat.

*cough*

BUT STILL.

Lots of work? = Long post.

2011-06-12T21:36:00.004+08:00

Haven't seen me here lately because, honestly, I haven't been procrastinating. Like a good little girl.

So...the fact that I'm doing this now speaks volumes. *cough*

I forgot if I've mentioned this or not (<--was that grammatically correct?...), but my trusty ol' laptop of...phew, 7 odd years...has given up on me and died. Well, OK, I'm lying- it's almost dead, but can still be used, but not without it resulting in me wanting to throw it against a wall and ENSURING its death. (I would never do that though. It'd be messy, and I'm sure someone would yell at me.)

Good news is that I got my hands on another one. Unfortunately, like most of the cool gadgets in my life, it is second hand. Youngest child here, people. But I'm not complaining. It was hardly ever used, and it works marvellously (oooh, wasn't that just so British of me. Blame Merlin and Doctor Who. *sips tea*).

It's all white, so my first instinct was to name it 'Whitey' (being the creative genius that I am), but that just made me feel racist. So, no name as of yet. You could argue that it is inanimate, and therefore needs no freaking name....in which case, pffft, you're no fun. I welcome suggestions in the comment box! If, you know. Anybody's reading this.

.....Hello? *echo*

So yes. I am obsessed with my new webcam. You should all know that my last laptop HAD no inbuilt webcam- I had to keep a separate contraption in a drawer. Good times, good times. (/sarcasm)

One Friday night, a thunderstorm resulted in 7 consecutive blackouts in my house (on off on off on off on off etc.), and it messed up my modem, so I found myself without internet for about a week.

horror.jpg

But I found ways to amuse myself. Look at the things I made instead of seizing the opportunity to catch up on some work! :

How perverted of me. HAHAHAHHAHA. FYI, those were made at entirely different intervals and have no relation to each other. But they seem to fit together now, don't they? What'd I say. Creative genius.

I was going to go on about HOW INCREDIBLY AWESOME THE LAST EPISODE OF DOCTOR WHO IS...but I think I'm just gonna go ahead and skip that. I think I've subjected you to enough torture with this post.

Feels good to just write stuff out, though. Just...'stuff'.

...surprisingly, not when it's in the form of 'work' that needs to be handed in and evaluated.

What're you gonna do.

PS: Hope you're reading this yaar, sorry it took so long to write something new- I know how your life revolves around this blog, hahahahaha! ;) You can thank me by naming your unborn baby after me.

My facial expression. All of tonight and tomorrow morning.

2011-06-02T17:39:00.004+08:00

Except much less attractive.

DOCTAAAAH.

2011-05-19T22:20:00.009+08:00

Before I start my Doctor Who appreciation post, can I just show my love for John Green and his latest giant squid of anger rant? As an English Lit. major...it touched the heart, haha.

Mathematicians and novelists alike, go and watch The Education Continuum WARNER CHILCOTTED.

OK. Allons-y!

I'm always quite hesitant to call myself a Doctor Who fan, because I've never known anything other than 10 and 11. And as a fan of many shows, I can admit to being protective over them and once in a while thinking horrible thoughts about people who claim they are fans but basically, *cough* do not know as much as me because they haven't watched all the episodes/seasons and are not, you know. Fangirl-y.

It's horrible, I know I know I knowwwww. And selfish and obnoxious and stupid.

But that's just how fandoms work.

So I have to be very clear in saying I am a fairly new fan of Doctor Who thanks to David Tennant and Matt Smith, and have every intention of watching Chris Eccleston when I get the chance. I love how Tennant portrays the Doctor- all that mad energy; flailing about when he's excited, the way he says "What?!", lol....but that incredible moment when he threatens somebody, I genuinely feel scared for them- that's how amazing he is. I most definitely did cry when he regenerated into the 11th Doctor, and I was adamant in thinking I was gonna hate the new guy. But then there was Matt Smith- all baby-faced and goofy and amazing, with his cool bow-tie...well, actually, his whole 'mad professor' getup, and you can't help but fall in love with him too.

THIS SHOW THOUGH.
IT'S BRILLIANT. (Brilliant. How British of me. I've been using it a lot lately. Bwahahahaa)

The writing is amazing (and I fangirl just as much over Steven Moffat as I do over the show in general)- it's just the right balance of 'horrifying' and 'OMG WTH LMAO'. Which, I don't have to tell you, is hard to do.

I'm not very good at reviews, and I probably shouldn't have admitted that I'm an English Lit. major, because sometimes (or all the time- depending on how severely you judge me) my writing is embarrassing. So I won't drag this out for long, and will finish by saying...I love a good cry-face.

Very few men on TV can affect me with their cry-faces. But man oh man. These men certainly do:

(not mine, but I have no idea who to credit)

and I didn't think he could do it, but yup, latest episode, he definitely made me cry with this:

Arrrrrggghhh. Moments like those...it's like they stab you right through the heart and leave you there, hurting and bleeding.

What a horrible way to end a post.

But there you go.

Watch Doctor Who and prepare to have your mind (and heart, I guess) be blown to smithereens.

P.S If I had to choose 5 of my favorite episodes so far, they would be as follows (left this to the last minute because it was incredibly difficult to have to narrow it down to 5):

1) S2E4 - The Girl In The Fireplace (The monsters under your bed?...and they are CREEPY.)
2) S3E2 - The Shakespeare Code (Yup. Shakespeare. With Harry Potter references aplenty.)
3) S3E10 - Blink (with Carey Mulligan, woohoo! This one will scare ya.)
4) S5E10 - Vincent and The Doctor (That's 'Vincent van Gogh' to you.)
5) S6E4 - The Doctor's Wife (Neil Gaiman Neil Gaiman Neil Gaiman Neil Gaiman)

Kaleidoscope....OF FEELINGS.

2011-05-15T22:48:00.005+08:00

Still suffering the post-concert blues, but I'm gonna have to do this, if only to get it out of my system.

Sara Bareilles.

You beautiful, talented woman, you.
I love you.

I went into it expecting a pleasant show. You know- great singing, laid back atmosphere, a bit of banter and maybe if I was lucky she'd let slip a swear word or two. Pleasant.

But it was so so so so so much more than pleasant.

It was amazing.

Our seats were GOLD, and from the minute her opening act came on- Javier Dunn (also her guitarist), remember the name- the crowd went wild, as they should.

And with an audience reaction like that, you can't expect not to get sucked into the excitement of it all. Javi's guitar wasn't red, but he was on fayaaaaah. He performed his own songs and he's an amazing singer in his own right, not to mention a kick-ass guitarist, but once he wove in covers of Bruno Mars' 'Marry You' and Adele's 'Rolling In The Deep'...he had us all by the balls, muahaha. GENIUS! And then he later joined Sara onstage, and amazed us all again with his kick-ass-ed-ness.

Unfortunately, I own a crappy camera and all my pictures and videos are, well, crappy. But the lovely Cappy brought along her gadgets so you can check out the results riiiiiight ----> here.

I can't even begin to describe how incredible this experience was. I mean, Kelly Clarkson was a bonus- I love her, but I never planned to go to any of her concerts...it just...sorta happened. But with Sara B., OH MAN. I had her on my "MUST SEE IN CONCERT" list, along with Gavin DeGraw and Matt Nathanson. This was, quite literally, a dream come true. That doesn't happen very often, does it.

And even if I wasn't a fan (pfffft unthinkable) and had found myself in the middle of all this by some random twist of fate- after her performance of King of Anything, I would've fallen in love with her then and there. The person taking this vid must've been in the same row with us, or close enough, so this was basically what we were seeing:

I GOT TO SING ALONG. Oh, and I was on Team Javier and Team Philip, lol. OHHH and she played us her cover of Single Ladies. WHAT?! YES, AWESOME.

For her encore she performed Gravity, which I think I can say is the one song every Sara Bareilles fan wants to hear her sing live at one point in their lives.

I got to experience that. And it was every bit as magical as I hoped it would be. The whole thing was. <3

Special thanks to Cappy and Syims for making it extra special! To many, many more experiences like this one, wahey!

Here, have a gif of Miss Sara B. rockin' out!

Photo/Video Credits:
bambistarlight
saurahsayuti
mich3nic

In the flesh, baby!

2011-05-09T22:15:00.003+08:00

This Wednesday!

Concert details and evidence of camwhoring will be provided.

This is me, all day tomorrow and the next day:

Not my best, but still pretty awesome.

2011-05-08T00:44:00.005+08:00

WEIRD DREAM POST!

Ok. Obviously, since it's 12:44am, I had this dream a while ago, so things are more than a little hazy, and I'm sorry to say I can't go into the details. Damnit.

BUT BUT BUT

I remember all the people involved, and the most important and bizarre thing to happen in it, so brownie points for that.

Check it:

Winchester brothers.
Giles(/Uther? But I prefer Giles).
Merlin.

See, if the Doctor had been in this dream, I think this would've been the best dream in my history of weird dreams, or at the very least would've made the top 5. But still...

WOOT.

We're sitting at a dining table, one of those fancy long ones, you know? Because we be classy and shit.

And I just know we had some weird conversations over dinner at that table, but for the life of me, I really can't remember what went down. Boo.

But then it's nearing the end of our little get-together, and I'm sitting opposite Colin Morgan- guhhh his smile, I remember him smiling at me....

........<3 <3 <3 ...........

......so, yeah, anyway....he's smiling (squeee) and the Winchester boys are off in a corner giggling away (yeah, J-squared giggling- the most adorable thing EVAR) and I notice Tony Head is walking to Colin's chair. He has this huge grin on his face, and I'm sitting there, wondering what was going to happen next...kinda scary, I must admit.

Suddenly, Tony reaches over and smacks Colin on the back of his head!

And I feel like it was ME he hit because why would anyone do anything to hurt dear, sweet Colin :( and I was sitting there in shock, when suddenly...Colin looks up at me.....

grins.....

and starts singing the chorus to "Baby" By Justin Bieber.

THE END.

Toys "R" Us is still cool. Just smaller.

2011-04-28T14:18:00.004+08:00

This was supposed to be a Doctor Who post, which is way past overdue, but I don't have much time and I figured a freaking Doctor Who post needs proper focus- gotta get into the zone, the rant-o-meter needs to be maintained, the squee-age machine needs to be well-oiled.

I don't know where all that came from.

Must be the herbs in this herbal tea I'm chugging. Also, I put it in this glass I found in the cupboard, but it's actually really huge for normal drinkware, and I'm starting to suspect it's a vase. Oh well.

Anyway, met up with the Inspector a few days ago- first time we've met up since she got married.

Ate bad food, watched a REALLY bad movie, wreaked havoc in a random Toys "R" Us, and got lost in the parking lot looking for our car.

Basically, the best day EVAR. Sometimes all you need is a BFF filled day, ya know?

Til the next time we meet, luv ya biyatch! Call ~~if you need me~~ everyday!

Deadline's tomorrow? Pfffft. I'm busy.

2011-04-14T14:56:00.004+08:00

Slumber party this weekend! If we don't reminisce (a word I think I learned from Mariah Carey) about the 90s, I will be disappointed.

But then again, we do that all the time anyway.

I don't have much to say, which of course means that the only reason this post exists is because there is work to be done and I don't feel like doing it at this moment. Procrastination at its best.

Since the last post, the latest addition to my family has been, well, added. Brand new nephew, born a day after April Fool's. Not gonna lie, we were all worried he'd be stuck with 1/4/11 as his birthday. Can you imagine the things he'd have to go through at school? HAHAHA. Don't worry, kid. Your coolest Aunt will always have...gum.

He's so tiny, none of the newborn clothes we got him would fit properly. Heavy (3.6kg), but tiny. As long as he's healthy, right? <3

Weddings and births left and right this week, so if that doesn't decrease world suck by at least a little bit, I don't know what will.

Heehee.
See what I did there?

Fine, that may have been an excuse just to use that gif. I have so many unused gifs, it's not even funny. Gotta slip them in when I can.

BOO, I HAVE TO GET BACK TO WORK.

The new model is jealous.

2011-03-23T19:33:00.005+08:00

Not that it's easy to bounce back from negativity, but I think it's important that you try. I'm all for wallowing in self-pity for maybe a day (or two), but at some point you think "Fuck this" and just...I dunno. Drown yourself in all the goodness the internet has to offer (I'll leave your creative minds to deduce what this may mean for me personally) until you're happy enough to find the motivation you need to bulldoze your way through whatever's been thrown at you.

That's been my routine, at least.

Psssssh. Haters are everywhere- and sure, they get to you sometimes, but if you're gonna plow through, just

and move on, amirite? Haha. (Thanks Dean, you're the best. Also....RAWR.)

In other news, I found my old camera-

it's big and heavy and runs on 4 AA batteries, which means I have about 5 minutes (sure feels like it) before they run out. I haven't used it in years, but I may start again- it takes pretty good videos. You know...before it DIES from battery depletion. But no matter. With my new nephew biding his time to greet us all, this ol' thing may come in handy.

Give new life to old things, eh?

:)

Alone In The Cave

2011-03-20T17:11:00.003+08:00

That's what I'm gonna start calling my house- The Cave.

It's not an unpleasant sort of 'cave'. It's quite cozy. I only call it that because it's actually quite dark inside during the daytime, and whilst I like to allow the loverly sunlight to do its thang, the rest of my family doesn't think it adequate, and prefers to switch on all the lights.

Natural lighting FTW- 'sallmsayin'.

This weekend was an interesting one, full of talk of the future- my future, to be exact. It's nice to know I was blessed with the family I have.

...What?
You were expecting details?
Not how I roll, boo.
How bout we all just take a nap? It's the perfect kinda weather for it.

How was my day?

2011-03-15T21:34:00.001+08:00

Kissy Face.

2011-03-13T23:29:00.006+08:00

Maybe it's because I'm suffering from a mild concussion from knocking my head on a chair earlier in the day, or because I have enough herbal tea in me to fill a swimming pool (herbal? What kind of herbs? Who knows...), but I can only remember two instances in which I'd be watching something, and I'd think "The music. It's perfect. PERFECT."

And this is going to drive me crazy, because as a music lover who watches....stuff (aka TV shows/movies/whatever)...and a lot of it....how can I only remember two?! No no, there must be more. But let me share my two with you now. In case I forget them and later on I'll be complaining about not being able to remember them but then I can just go back to this post (assuming I remember I even wrote it).

Confused? Good. You're ready for a Smiley post. Let's do this thang.

Number 1. Latika's Theme from Slumdog Millionaire.

I'm sure there was a post dedicated to this movie, yes? Yes. And I still love it. And this song moves me to tears whenever I hear it. Not an exaggeration here, people. Just another random confession. I couldn't find a good enough video that had both the scene and the whole song, so this will have to do.

It's just so hauntingly beautiful. Had I not watched the movie, hearing it would have made me feel sad anyway- but knowing how the song elevates the emotion of certain scenes, and remembering the story...it damn near devastates me.

....*tear*......

Number 2. Since I don't know the title, I'm just gonna call it Arthur & Gwen's Theme.

OK. So maybe you have to be a giant nerd to get this one. Not the cool nerd, like the one in Zac Levi's dictionary. The kind that squees when legend and myth and fairytales and literature and maybe even history make their way into popular culture, and there's that one moment where you, yes you the giant nerd, are obsessing over something because you've read the story in some book in some instance in time and you know something EPIC is about to happen. And yes this is fairly recent, but that's not the only reason I remember it so well (I'm constantly finding new things to obsess about- we are talking bout ME here- so this one's special). Who hasn't heard of Arthurian legend. I mean, seriously? Seriously. So in Merlin (which you all should totally watch), when Arthur and Gwen share their first kiss...the music. It has to be EPIC. And it is.

Everything about Merlin is epic. They do recycle the music throughout the episodes/season, but it's done with such finesse that it's just....magical *snort*. And it's just epic. From the opening theme to the credits. EPIC.

Let's pretend this post was borne from me intelligently reflecting upon life and art, and not from me trolling YouTube for hours and hours.

*cough*

This is me, procrastinating.

2011-03-13T10:53:00.005+08:00

Yeah, I don't really have anything to write about.

Funny how I feel the need to post when what I really need to be doing is typing up pages and pages of something else.

Well.

Being forced to write and writing just for the hell of it are worlds apart, aren't they.

Hey, when you hit that wall in the middle of working and you find yourself staring at a pile of books (staring, not reading/flipping through) for more than a minute- it's time to do something to take your mind off that numbing sensation spreading through your being, haha.

It's SUNDAY, dammit. But I suppose it's my own fault I find myself suffering through a day reserved for chillaxing.

BUT, I'm giving myself a short break.
Listen to some Sara B.
Wonder what's for lunch.
Think of how awesome Colin Morgan's cheekbones are.
Knights of The Round Table.

Wait, what?

[s]

Thasswassup.

Head Slappin' Giles and A Whole Lotta 90s

2011-03-08T16:32:00.005+08:00

I probably shoulda mentioned that whilst staying in Singapore, I've also gotten addicted to Merlin (I know I mentioned Lie To Me a while back, so this is a short continuation). A little bit because of moments like this:

And a lot because of this:

[s]

RAWR. Made it on THE LIST, boys.

I know I know, late on the train, but I got on it anyway, right? THAT COUNTS, SHUT UP. Anyway. *cough* In addition to the above, it's a lot of fun- lots of LOL moments, and it's hard for shows to get me to do that. So...yay. Sexy accents are a bonus. Check it.

~~~~

I was rooting around the guest bedroom last week, and I stumbled upon something which caused me to FEEL...THINGS. Not in the sexy way, but in the "OH MY GOD WHAT THE HELL...I LOVE THIS!...SHIT THIS IS EMBARRASSING" way.

My cassette stash from my childhood. Yeah, I know you see the 'N Sync. And the Britney. I can tell you there's some Eternal, some Offspring, some Jennifer Love Hewitt (what even), some Moffatts (kill me now) some GIL (*dead*). And lots, lots more. There's even a mix tape in there.

Let's all admit we went through the same phase and let me get over this little blast-from-the-past discovery in peace.

Ahem.

2011-03-05T14:00:00.004+08:00

If you know me at all and are therefore wondering where my American Idol posts are....I just want to say it's still pretty early to squee/bitch/rant about it. (Here, anyway. My Twittah is on fire when it comes to Idol nights.)

But

That is all.

APPROPRIATE GIFS AND CAMWHORE SESSION: Nerd Edition

2011-03-02T20:56:00.002+08:00

So I had some errands to run today, which pretty much took up my whole morning. But as I was driving up to my house on the way back, I saw the postman trying to stuff something in the letterbox and I was like

He eventually managed to get it in, but he didn't notice me and nearly reversed his bike into my car, then there was an awkward waving situation like

I didn't think the package was for me anyway, so when I found out it was I was like

because I knew what it was. And there was another surprise for me because Cappy had written me a beautiful note

and I had to stop myself from

And then came the actual gift

and even though I already knew what it was it still made me go

and I spent the day wearing it around the house like

which makes me look

but I don't care coz I'm a

and if you don't like it, then this space, right here?

And Cappy? Thank you. So, so much. I can't say it enough.

My Books Are Plotting To Kill Me, I'm Sure.

2011-02-22T20:58:00.008+08:00

They've succeeded, but only halfway. And I guess being only half dead is enough for me to keep writing my damned report.

Consider this post 'a break'.
Or my sanity's savior.
Whichever.

First of all, listen to me bitch. Ready?:

I'm super hungry- I didn't think it was possible, but my stomach is making my brain ache. Evidently, not only are my books out to murder me, so are my internal organs. Also, my hair right now? Elvis would be proud. And I'M JUST SAYIN'- if I ever have to write any more academic papers after this masters thing, I will be very, very, very miserable.

Very.

Very.

OK people, truth bomb. I'm not sad or angry anymore, but I am tired. Not physically tired, which I would think of as an upgrade because that would mean that I've been doing something that required me to get some sort of exercise, and that can't be bad. But no, this is exhaustion of the mental kind.

Mental. Yes. Accurate.

All things aside (betrayal and whatnot), I'm pretty tired of the path I've been forcing myself to face. But then I think, hey. I chose it, right? Might as well walk it 'til I drop.

But I think I may be very close to dropping.

Damnit.

Feelings, feelings, feelings. So girly. I need to butch up this blog, haha.

[s]

BAM.

Whut.

I Kinda Need This.

2011-02-21T00:13:00.003+08:00

Because I'm about to type like there's no tomorrow. Although technically it already is tomorrow. Nevermind, just trust me when I say it won't be fun.

So since I'm still waiting on the Oscars and that moment where I will pee my pants with excitement (aka when Zachary Levi and Mandy Moore take the stage), I don't think there'll be a shortage of Zach Levi fawn-age on every site I have an account with.

Oh, but that does not mean THE LIST has to stop growing, my friend.

Y'all know of my insomniatic (which probably isn't a word) tendencies whenever I'm in Singapore, and I know I've shared stories of the different TV shows that have accompanied me during those long nights. On this trip, 'Lie To Me' has been more than willing to stay up with me, and so I have been introduced to the awesomely nerdy Eli Loker aka Brendan Hines. And he sings, too. Rawr.

Oh, looky there.
Even Zachary approves.

I Told You I Had A Weird Thing With Trains

2011-02-20T11:18:00.006+08:00

WEIRD DREAM POST!

It's been a while! Actually, I've purposely been keeping them from you (that's another way of saying I forgot what they were about/I was too lazy to write it down straight away and THEN I forgot what they were about).

Anyway. Let us begin.

I'm underground, waiting on a platform for a train. And at first I think I'm gonna meet Harry Potter, but that doesn't happen and yes, I'm a little bit disappointed.

But I figured since I'm there, and I can hear the distant choo-choo's getting closer and closer- why not just get on the damn train.

It arrives and amidst the steam and the hustle and bustle of people getting on and off the train (an old school train, apparently. Steam???...yeah, ok.), I may be imagining it but I think I can hear someone calling my name.

But it's a dream and I think I kinda know it's a dream, so I ignore it and hope for the best as I hop on the train.

As I step foot in it, all the noise suddenly disappears and I hear the sound of a door sliding shut, so I turn around to see the spot through which I just entered and it's an LRT door.

I'm in an LRT now.
Oooooh.
*dream magic*

As I stand there grinning about it, there's an angry tap on my shoulder (which kinda hurts) and I turn around to face Mark Salling, looking really pissed.

But but but but, I mean, he's still crazy hot. Just...pissed. And he yells at me "Why were you running? I. Don't. RUN!"

See? Told ya. Crazy (hot).

And how dare he accuse me of running. Haven't done that since the 90s. So I yell back "What the hell are you talking about? Get away from me." And I give him a shove which I'm sure didn't even make him stumble coz I'm kinda girly when it comes to shoves, and I leave in a huff and find somewhere far away to sit.

As I sit there wondering if I did the right thing by moving away from Mark freakin' Salling, I feel someone sit next to me and there he is, grinning at me.

And I can't help but grin back. But then he says:

"I sleep naked. What's the point of sleeping in clothes?" (sidenote: I have a feeling this comes from a Zachary Levi quote. Fairly certain, actually. And I did have a Levi overload last night (every night *cough*), and I remember coming across this particular quote again and again. Oh, brain. You funny.)

And after a beat, I reply with:

"What's wrong with you? At least wear some pants!"

The End.

I'm Hairy. No...wait....

2011-02-16T01:07:00.004+08:00

I can't sleep yet. I wonder if it's because I'm homesick? I doubt it- I always have trouble sleeping here in Lionpore. I wasn't kidding about feeling better- so the 'no sleep' thing is not related to anything depressing...at least...I don't think.

And here I was, skeptical about the whole 'a makeover will fix all of life's problems' thing in movies. It works to some extent- who'd have thunk it?! And I also pulled a face when Raju told me of the time she was so depressed she wanted to chop all her hair off.

Dude. I totally get it now.

It was like all that hair was getting in the way. Gettin' in yo' face. Like the thing that's making you mad in the first place- it just won't leave you alone for one goddamn minute, gaaahhhh.

Speaking of hair. Not that it's important or anything, but every person who has ever been assigned to cut my hair, EVER (and this is throughout my life, so a lot, a lot of people) have ONE thing in common.

They come from different countries and backgrounds, speak different languages, form different sentence structures, have different tones of voices...but always the same basic idea is expressed at one point or another-

"Your hair is really thick."

It happened 2 days ago, and the time before that, I had 2 people sweating over me at the same time as they blow-dried my hair. Then they look at me like I'm supposed to know how to fix it. I don't take offense or anything...I just find it funny that every one of them would say the same thing.

It's weird.
But also cool.
That all these different people would immediately think the same thing when faced with the rat's nest on my head.

I remember when I was in Primary 3, the class was doing an experiment on hair; there were like 5 volunteers and I was one of them. We each had to tape a strand of our hair to the edge of a table, and at the end of it we attached a paper envelope. The experiment was to slowly slip 1 ringgit coins (remember those? yeah.) into the envelope one by one and see how much the hair could take before it snapped. We went down the line, and everyone else's snapped after the 2nd or 3rd coin. And then it was my turn. Coin after coin went in, and I was starting to sweat because everyone was looking at me funny. I don't remember how many coins went in, but I remember feeling relieved when the damn hair finally broke. I think I was labeled the freak for a while. Not in so many words. But I avoided the topic of hair for a while there all the same.

And the first time I ever tried dyeing my hair...nothing happened. Second, third, fourth, fifth time, and beyond (I think)....nothing happened. It's not until recently that the color would actually stick.

Sheesh.

There's another relevant memory in here somewhere.....ah yes. I was four, in Vienna, and I was taking the underground train to school (with my mom, of course). And I remember this little old lady saying something to my mother about the thickness of my hair. And then not long after that, someone called me Smiley for the first time. While I was on the train.

What is it with me and trains?

...well there's a thought random enough to end this post with.

Just When I Was Losing Hope...

2011-02-13T22:01:00.013+08:00

Alhamdulillah.

Things are looking up.

Tonight is a good night.

Got a haircut.

Lookin'...I don't even know...(but I'm azn, yo. *pose*), but feelin' awesome.

Got an email. A good email.

Feel even more awesome. (Awesome....er?)

Just chillin'.

Not feeling sorry for myself.

Can't keep the =) down for long!

It's An Angry One, Folks.

2011-02-11T12:35:00.008+08:00

Being nice is a curse, you know.

The world expects you to be good and kind and 'nice' because apparently what everyone wants is for the world to be a better place, for humans to treat each other the way they themselves want to be treated, and so being 'nice' is the way to go. Encouraged.

Sometimes it works.

Sometimes it just leaves you feeling like the universe fucked you over.

I don't care if you think my constant need to please people is pathetic or fake. I feel what I feel, I live what I know, and what I know is that it's better to make people feel good about themselves, even when they're yelling at me or telling me that I'm wrong (unless you're my friend, then I feel comfortable enough to yell back, hehe). Because self-doubt? Yeah, that's my world. It's kind of a bummer. Sometimes it's hard to bring myself to still care about the other person's feelings, especially if I...you know. Hate them. But even then, I try.

Am I exaggerating this? Friends who still read my blog? Is this not true? Am I not the one always looking for that ray of sunshine in an otherwise stormy situation? Even when I hate what a certain person is doing, don't I somehow end up saying "...but, maybe, they had a good reason....."?

I'm not a saint, y'all know that. Between the cussing and the bitching, there's no way I could be the perfect example of 'nice'.

But you should know that I try never to make anyone angry. I never want to disappoint anybody. I don't understand why people like to stir shit up when things are good the way they are- even though it may not be the most exciting thing ever, but it's...good.

If you're the complete opposite and are the type to grab life by the balls, live in the moment, make some drama, get out there and RAWWWRRRRR...hey. Go for it. I admire you. You sound like fun. Maybe we can balance each other out.

Also, I always wondered why some people are so ashamed when they tell me that they have a small group of friends instead of like, you know, 5000 friends on Facebook.

Call it anti-social, but I'm not going to call you my friend just because I know your name, we have something in common, our families know each other, we have the same classes together, or if I've known you for years. That all helps, sure. And I like a lot of people, I really do.

But I shouldn't have to tell you that it runs deeper than that. Or at least it does for me. And it's complicated, isn't it? I mean, there are people who I can't say I really know, in terms of background and family and things like that. But maybe we experienced something together that had an impact on me, and in that one moment it allowed me to have a glimpse of who they really are, the person that maybe before the experience, they've been hiding. And I consider them my friends. I don't know if the feeling is mutual, but this is just from my side, so hey. Issall good.

And I know it's not really fair, but don't we all have certain expectations from those we deem our 'friends'? In girl-world, talking about each other to other people can't be avoided- I'm not even gonna try to deny that. But even then, it's the way you do it that counts, isn't it? Either you talk about them because you're concerned about them or are sticking up for them, or you talk about them because you wanna bring 'em down in front of other people- that's the determining gauge between friend and frenemy.

I'm rambling.
Well, since I've started...

Fortunately (I guess), because I have such a small group of friends, there haven't been many instances in my life where I ever needed to use words such as 'betrayal'. It's so....romance-novel like, haha. Never even gave it much thought.

Well, as of recently, I can tell you this:

Betrayal sucks ass.

My state of mind right now?

In that order.
Then rinse and repeat.

Dance, Don't Dance, Dance.

2011-02-08T11:27:00.005+08:00

Wedding's over! Raju is now Mrs. Faizal, woot woot.

It was so amazing! And I really did try not to cry- I was doing pretty well, but then Yas had to mess it up and cry when her mother hugged her, and then I lost it. But it only lasted like 5 minutes. Because who wants to be all snotty on such a happy day, right?

I was kind of in a hard position to take any pictures, but I did try- they're less than stellar, but at least I got some. God knows I would've loved to share every minute with you and if I had a better camera and actual time allocated for picture taking, I would've ended up with 500++ shots, I'm sure, haha. There was a lot of dancing, and laughter, also some situations that I'd rather forget (no fault of the bride or her family- shit happens though, gotta deal), but overall..dude. Awesome experience. Hands down the best wedding I've ever been to, personally. Her family deserves credit and love for everything that went down- y'all have no idea how hard they worked. Photos are up on my FB page, but I gotta leave a lil' sumthin' sumthin' here.

So I leave you with this video. It pretty much encompasses what we're all about: I coax her to do something stupid, she does it really, really well, then she calls me an ass for laughing, and I remind her about it for the rest of her life. (I should probably mention this was immediately after her majlis khatam Quran, so...completely inappropriate, but that's how we roll, HAHAHAHAHA.)

Amidst the flurry of her costume changes and me trying not to get yelled at for not knowing what to do, there was pretty much no time to think of anything non-wedding related.

But when the crowd started to disappear, and the sun was setting on the last day of festivities, when the pengapits were no longer needed...

I had to try my very best not to think of everything we've been through together and how even though I know she's much too awesome to ever change the things about herself that we all know and love- well. Marriage always changes things, doesn't it.

But what is it if not another test that life throws us. So we all gotta work a little harder to get what we want- what else is new? =P

At least we'll have the memory of moments like this, where I'm trying to take a legitimate, normal, nice picture that I can frame and keep forever...and there she is, giving me creepy looks with those humongous eyeballs of hers, making me snort in ways I never knew I could.

Enjoy Langkawi.

Beeyotch.

<3

Guess what.

2011-02-01T15:11:00.001+08:00

That is all.

Do not disturb.

Dear Arnab: I Don't Have Your Blender Yet!

2011-02-01T12:20:00.007+08:00

Homaigawd, I've been waiting for 500 years, but it's happening this weekend! My best friend is getting married!

I gotta get shit ready and I know I haven't called or anything, but I'm suffering from non-paid-phone-bill-itis, a common disease known to students around the world! So don't be surprised if Sha and I just show up on your doorstep. We'll make up for it by doing anything and everything your mother tells us, ok?

Alrighty, this post is dedicated to you, Raju.

So before you go ahead and have your 5 babies in one year- 2 of which I will make my own, unless they cry a lot, then I'm giving them back- let's recount our life story, shall we?

There we are, kids aged 16 and 18, innocent as can be, trying to survive in the world of Matriculation Centre of IIUM. The garden of knowledge and virtue, if you will.

Our first conversation was probably the lamest thing EVAR.

*in the corner of some dingy office space on campus*

Me:...I love Reader's Digest.
You: OMG, ME TOO!

And when you asked if we should room together, I totally didn't want to, cause you scared the crap outta me. HAHAHAHA. But Allah knew better and lo and behold, a friendship was born.

A friendship that spans almost a decade now.

Here's to many, many more years of me asking you if you're related to a certain person, of you insulting me in Tamil, of us fighting and making up through text messages, hahhaa.

Love ya, bebeh! There's nobody like you, and I'm glad I can share this special day with you!

And because I wrote all of this, you are now obligated to name your firstborn after me.

See you Thursday ;)

So THIS happened at 3 in the AM.

2011-01-28T12:45:00.004+08:00

Excuse the French.

This year's Oscars is gonna be MAJORLY EPIC. (...Theoretically.)

Right here, baby. Right here.

2011-01-25T20:11:00.002+08:00

“If I’m ever going to be happy in life, I’m going to have to find a woman who likes, not likes, really loves watching her husband play video games. Because that would be…that’s a deal breaker right there. ‘Honey, I’m tied up with something right now’ ‘Oh that’s okay honey, I love watching you go.’” - Zachary Levi

Alternate Ending.

2011-01-24T22:11:00.006+08:00

My titles are always so dramatic. And usually have nothing to do with anything.

Anyway, Tumblr's down, so I'm gonna blog. This week has barely started and already I know it's going to contribute to me getting sicker, not better.

Lots of reading.
Lots of thinking.
Lots of typing.

But not of the fun variety. Unless you enjoy cussing frequently (but only in your mind so no-one hears you), then yes, a little bit of fun is to be had.

But I did (FINALLY, OMGWTFLOLBBQ) get to watch The Social Network today. And yes, I'll agree with the masses, it did not disappoint.

I may have only wanted to watch it for a LIST member (Jesse), but overall it was really good. I'm not much for reviews if I'm not being graded on it.

(Example: Go watch Tangled because it's so preeeetty and you can hear Zachary Levi sing and I like it.)

And hey hey, whaddya know, another one made it onto THE LIST. Welcome, Andrew Garfield. I look forward to watching you scale buildings and make out with Emma Stone. And that Spidey suit. Mmmmm.

...BROMANCE!

Also, 'days 2-4' is uploaded on LJ, if you're bored and have nothing better to do.

As for the robbery, there's not really much to tell- the po-po came and went. We still don't have our stuff back. But we DO have a new security alarm system installed, so WHATCHAAAAAAA.

So, that's all I have time for because now it's 'shower time', and then it's 'sleepy time', and then it's 'craaaaaap why do I have to work on this, why why why' time.

G'night!

Show Me Da Face!

2011-01-18T12:37:00.004+08:00

I'm baaaack.

And siiiiick.

But it's OK. I've got my pistachios from Bin Dawood to keep me company. ;)

Ugh, I probably shouldn't be doing this right now, I feel so horribly..."blurry". That's a thing, right? Especially when you're sick.

If you feel like reading my thoughts on the trip, I started a new lj account so it should be on there; I'll upload them one by one. The first one is already up.

It was great to be there- definitely something I wanted and needed for a while now.

BUT, it was also great to come back home; I got teary-eyed while watching that Asha Gill video about how to get around KLIA while I was on the plane, minutes from arriving on Malaysian soil. Just 'cause.

It's so HARD to be on your best behaviour 24/7, haha.

One complaint though. Most women there cover their faces- sometimes showing some eye action, sometimes not even that- but issall good, I mean, you do what you gotta do.

But it was a little unnerving. In the sense that you can't read their facial expressions, which is kinda sorta a little bit (but also a lot) important. And we kinda stuck out while we were there, with our colorful tudungs and whatnot, and lemme just say....you'd think with only their eyes showing, they'd have mastered the art of being subtle..but apparently that's just an assumption. I can tell when you're staring, lady. Especially when you're not bothering to hide it. Sheesh.

Also, with that kind of barrier, there was a severe lack of Smileys in my world, and I was all like

So I think I may have to do this now.

Thank you to

1) Smiling Waiter Guy: You have beautiful eyes and a wicked smile, teehee. Thanks for coming over and making conversation while constantly asking me if you can help me with anything. I hope you make it to Malaysia one day too- look me up when you do, muahahaa ;)

2) Smiling Kashmiri Sejadah Seller Guy: You too have a wicked smile, the cheeky kind, teehee. Thanks for being the first person to correctly identify me as a Malaysian, with that lilting accent of yours when you said "Melayu kan? Dari Kuala Lumpur!" Made my day. Also, thanks for giving my mom that price she wanted for all the crap she bought, haha.

3) Smiling Egyptian Lady At The Mosque: Such a friendly smile, fitting with that amazing personality of yours. Thanks for putting my mom, grandma and me at ease when our nervousness at being confronted by the man yelling "tutup muka! tutup muka" at us started to show on our faces. She told us not to bother, it's kinda just a Saudi thing. Considering we're basically strangers, thanks for giving us all bear hugs and motherly kisses when we told you we'd be going home.

That's it. 3 Smileys are enough to make my life. :)

Sorry, this was sort of a crappy post, not really informative. Maybe I'll try and redo it when I'm not feeling bleeeeeeuuuurrrrrrrrrggghhhhhhhh-y.

*edit* I totally forgot to mention this: everything on the trip went so well that I was starting to get suspicious, and of course- something happened. Not on the trip, but when we got back home, it turns out our house had been broken into. Which, you know. Sucks. I won't go into it, it'll just get me angry, and it's extra exhausting being angry when you're unhealthy, so yeah. Updates on that some other time. :(

It Does So Count As Traveling

2011-01-04T09:35:00.007+08:00

Alrighty folks, tomorrow I leave to perform umrah, so I'd sincerely like to apologize for anything I've said or done (or thought?) that might've impacted you in a negative way.

...and now to do this on FB and Twitter. Hahahhaa. Or maybe not, I don't know yet.

Anyway, InsyaAllah I'll be back to terrorize the interwebz in about 16 11 days.
But as a better person.
InsyaAllah.
....Isn't Chuck coming back soon?....
Focus, Smiley, focus.

SALAAAM!

Excuses which I strongly believe are valid.

2010-12-29T15:16:00.004+08:00

There are several reasons as to why gifs have been plaguing my blog lately.

1) Finally found a program that will cater to my needs with extreme ease and no complications.
2) Frustrations have compelled me to use appropriate gifs to convey my moods, because let's face it- sometimes you can't find the words.
3) I am too lazy to think up and type out my frustrations, thus refer to (2).

Let's see now.
I have a couple of minutes.

I miss having these moments with friends:

And maybe there's something wrong with me that these friends are now making me go:

I'm in a funk. Most conversations elicit this response from me:

But hopefully in 2 weeks time, my soul will have been cleansed and I'll be back to doing this:

The End. Hahahahhaa. I'm sorry to those who have crap internet connection and had to wait for all those to load. But that was FUN. See ya when I see ya!

To Those Celebratin' Tonight...

2010-12-25T21:54:00.002+08:00

Have a very Merry Christmas!

Hope Santa got you all you wished for ;)

Non-Real Kiss Appreciation Post.

2010-12-21T21:03:00.013+08:00

It's a little disturbing how sexy that kiss is. But not really. Coz I totally dig it.

I NEED THE TANGLED DVD. FER SRS. I don't think I can watch it any more times than I already have at the cinema. Unless, you know...I do. But can you imagine all the extras?! GAHHHH. MUST. HAVE.

Other than that, not much to report.

Today sucked ass.

(read tweets from bottom to top)

But as you can see, I've already whined about it all day- so how bout I share some things that made me happy today?

VISUAL PRESENTATION, GO!

Aaaaaaand we're back to smiling.

Zach Levi/Chuck Norris- gimme back my Emmy.

2010-12-12T14:48:00.003+08:00

WEIRD DREAM POST!

The minute I remembered it, I wrote it on Twitter and FB to remind me of it, since I didn't have time to blog about it...but then of course I forgot all about it.

Until Cappy, bless her, recently wished me goodnight by telling me to dream of Mr. Levi himself, and it went off like a bell in my head. So here goes.

I'm back in high school (the horror). Sitting in math class (the agony). But oddly enough I don't feel like my insides were churning and my palms weren't sweating (as was usual for every math class I've ever been to). Instead, I felt strangely calm. Comfortable, even.

Ahhh, here comes the math teacher. Oh look, she's smiling! Beaming! Positively glowing! She takes a seat in front of me and holds out her hands for me to take.

Um. OK.

I reached out to hold them, because it seemed rude not to. Then she tells me: "Sweetie, I'm so proud of you. It's a big responsibility though, and I think you'll do a good job respecting it."

Me: "......OK.....?" (didn't know what the hell she was talking about).

Her: "Here's your Emmy. You've done so well in class!" *hands me a freakin' EMMY. AN EMMY AWARD. YES, THE EMMY AWARD.*

Me: "........thanks?........"

*DOOR BURSTS OPEN* (at this point I can't remember, but it would've made sense if it was actually kicked in)

Zachary Levi walks over to me! I'm sure it's him! But this is unconscious me seeing him from MY view, so Dream Me hasn't seen him yet, but as Dream Me turns around to face him......it's actually

CHUCK NORRIS!

What. The hell.

And it gets weirder- from there this..."person" was basically just a flashing image alternating between Zachary Levi and Chuck Norris.

Anyway.

Zachuck Levorris marches up to me and points to my Emmy, then points to himself, then points to the Emmy.

And even though it makes no sense that I won that Emmy fair and square for all my hard work in Math class...it's MY Emmy. I wanna keep it.

But how do you argue with Zachuck Levorris? Wouldn't he simultaneously melt you with his puppy dog eyes then end you with a roundhouse kick to the face if you didn't give him what he wanted?

I wasn't willing to risk it. So I gave my Emmy to Zachuck Levorris.

He took it. Then disappeared.

I'm left there feeling sad.

I woke up cursing both Zachary Levi and Chuck Norris.

The End.

Hey, wanna try something fun?

2010-12-10T22:52:00.000+08:00

That is all.

POPCORN! AMIRITE?!

2010-12-07T22:20:00.005+08:00

I'm sorry to say the reason I'm updating is because I've been starved of the internet for about 2 days.

2 days to you...a lifetime for me. *tear*

Aaaanyway.

I've gotten back from visiting the parents in Singapore, where I also hit up Universal Studios with Cappy!

I didn't get to meet Shrek, but Puss In Boots was kind enough to let us take a picture with him, haha. It rained heavily at around noon- but we were already drenched from the awesomeness that was the Jurassic Park ride anyway, so woot woot. If you're not gonna go on any rides, just walking around is cool- transport yourself to different worlds eh, go on and have a lil fun. Also, get some popcorn. No, no, you don't understand. GET. SOME. POPCORN. Trust me. Shhh, don't say you're not a fan of popcorn, just...get some popcorn, ok? Don't argue with mama.

AND. The most important thing of all. I got me a "What The Frak" t-shirt. Uhhhyesahdid.

...more pictures would really be useful right about now. But I've lost my camera. It's weird that I'm not more panicky at the moment, but I have a feeling that's gonna come later when I've gotten over the fact that I'm able to go online again.

Apart from that, Raju and I spent some time catching up on Sunday- when I say "catching up", I mean I just sat there while she details my duties for the wedding like a drill Sergeant. Always fun though, always fun! AND SHE BROUGHT DONUTS! I lap you lah, Raju. And there's still like half a box of it in the fridge. I'll get to it when I'm not feeling like such a fatass.

So now we're in December. And then we'll be in January, the month in which I turn old enough that I'm able to say I lived a quarter of a century.

*sigh* or "WOOHOO!"?

Still remains to be seen.

Update? Sooooon, Sooooon.

2010-12-04T21:05:00.001+08:00

In the meantime...

GO WATCH TANGLED!

My Life Is MADE, Yet Again.

2010-11-20T15:25:00.008+08:00

YESSSS.

A Starkid, Phil from Wong Fu Productions, and now freakin' Paul Dateh.

Check him out and understand why I love this Twitter moment.

I can't stop grinning.

And look, what's he holding?

A RED ukulele?

:D

The Adventures of Raju and Arnab In 4 Pictures

2010-11-14T22:35:00.004+08:00

THANKS, Inspector. <3

P.S: We finished the rice 5 minutes ago.

I See No Lions.

2010-11-09T21:11:00.003+08:00

Fine. I purposely didn't wanna blog anytime soon because I wanted my 'Phil' post to stay at the top forever so that everytime I visited I'd see him first and be reminded of how awesome I felt when he replied to my tweet, even though it was only one word and a 'hehe'.

BUT STILL.

Anyway. Here's me finally blogging. You'd think it's because something interesting happened, but

meh.

OK, so I've been in Singapore since the weekend I freaked over the proposal hearing (which went OK). There was no yelling, and I'm eternally grateful. I stuttered the hell out of my presentation, and screwed up my notes BUT BUT BUT. It's over and done with. And now I just have the simple task of finishing my chapters, including the corrections suggested by the panel. CAKE! (See, this is why a sarcasm font is needed, people.)

Why is it so hard to get the right shade of red? I guess it's only hard when you refuse to bleach, which is a necessity if you have abnormally thick black hair. But I'm lazy and broke. So I was kinda stoked when I woke up this morning and my mom gave me her best 'WTF face', which prompted me to look in the mirror. Then take a picture.

MAGIC! ...or effects of pool chlorine on colored hair. Same difference! At least that's what I think whenever I watch Mythbusters. Which I do every weekday at 1am, by the way. Yes, I have trouble sleeping here, always have. Maybe it's because I don't watch TV in KL, but Singapore has gotten me addicted to Britain's Next Top Model, Mythbusters, Oprah and MTV.

Yup. Glimpse into my sad life, people.

I'm exaggerating. Actually 9 days into November, and it's been pretty great so far- and hopefully it'll get better! Road trip with my girl Cappy, and this weekend I get to hang out with Inspector Raj as she prepares to hand me her firstborn. Call me Rumpelstiltskin (is that how you spell it?! WTH. How can I realize only now I have no idea how to spell Rumpels- NEVERMIND)

Most people's November schedule seems to be pretty upbeat, so yay 2010, good job for the month. And while you're at it, make December one to remember too. End it with a bang, eh?

That Did NOT Just Happen!!!!!

2010-10-27T18:11:00.009+08:00

Except it totally, totally did.

First he was all:

And the link was to an old school *N Sync song, which made me LOL. So then I was like:

and then I realized:

AND THEN THIS HAPPENED!

WHAT?!

Yup.
Call me crazy, but in some small way, at least now he knows I exist, bwahahahaaa!
Life?
Complete.

Me, Philip Wang....and *N Sync.

YES.

A-Buzzin'!

2010-10-26T13:02:00.003+08:00

I had two mugs of coffee last night.

I don't understand it! Coffee never, EVER makes things better for me, and yet, I drink it again and again, thinking it's a smart move and that it'll help me to stay awake long enough to finish my work.

WTF is wrong with me?! Stupid face.

Coffee made me spend the wee hours of the morning stalking various YouTubers! ...And then I watched the Amazing Race. Team Jumba still goin strong, woot woot.

Sure, I did the work. But my head was filled with thoughts of Britney Spears and garlic bread (don't ask).

I need this Friday to come and go.
I need November to come quicker and stay forever.
I need...well, I need a lot of things.

Maybe some coffee will help clear my head.

1 Hour To Stress, So I Do This.

2010-10-21T17:05:00.006+08:00

In all seriousness though, free iPhone photo apps? The shit.

Those sleepless nights are leaving their mark.

And I need a haircut. Although according to Raju, short hair brings out my fat-ness. HAHAHA. I don't care man, one day (maybe after you get started on the 5 babies in 1 year), I'm chopping those locks off.

So, what to report, what to report?

...I've been using the phrase "FML" a lot.

I think that pretty much sums it up.

Wonder If The Choices Still Apply...

2010-10-19T21:39:00.007+08:00

I have a new girl crush. She's been around for a while, but I just found out about her so yeah. She's so pwetty.

Such a beautiful voice.

She's got a tongue piercing and I still regret not getting mine pierced when I was younger. And I could've gotten it done in Italy too, which would've made such a cool story.

Damn.

...Well, I say I could've, but that just means I thought about doing it. My mama would've

(a) disowned me
(b) locked me up in the house forever or
(c) killed me (but not really).

Raju, you were gonna get your eyebrow pierced while I pierced my tongue! Now it's too freakin' late! Hahahahhaa.

I say too late because life's just different now- different state of mind, different things to consider (now that you know you have to consider them)- and you just go with it.

SO. When will "life getting in the way" ever be a good thing for me?

Wahey, good things come when you least expect it...right?

Hmmm.

Be My Comfort, Please.

2010-10-18T18:50:00.004+08:00

Can I take comfort in the fact that I don't know that many people who are living the life they wanted/hoped for as children?

Because this isn't what I hoped for.

And I'm not taking it for granted- I'm better off than most people, I know that. But 'better off than most people'- really, how far does that notion take you in the 'I Love My Life' department?

You want a confession?

I haven't been the Smiley you know for about 2 years now.

And it's not like people would notice the difference, but it sucks that I can feel the difference.

Great.

Now people are gonna think I'm depressed or something.

But really, it's nowhere near anything like that (I...hope?). It's more...'disappointment' than 'depression', I guess.

And I'd feel better if I could convince myself that the things I'm doing now are paving a road to something bigger and and more satisfying (insert inappropriate joke here, aaaaathankyouverymuch) but I just can't seem to see the light- that little spark that makes me hold out for something better than 'now'.

Gahhhh, my little problems seem so insignificant...but they are problems. Just sayin'.

Oh well.

...Allah knows best.

Let's leave it at that.

Love Note to Twitter?

2010-10-10T19:48:00.009+08:00

Just felt like typing out a lil' sumthin' sumthin'.

...Fine, it was the crushing guilt of abandoning this blog for twitter that did it. But my intentions were good, and that's what matters.

*cough* Anyway.

Alright, see, I knew there was a reason to me telling myself (yes that sentence made me look crazy) I had to stay away from Twitter. I knew that it, coupled with my stalking tendencies, would get the better of me. And it really, really did.

It started off with me basically talking to myself online as I stayed up til 6 in the morning slaving away on my never ending, accursed, damned....where was I going with this...oh yeah- THESIS. And then realizing it was a good way to let off some steam. So I did it more. Throughout the day. And then I started following random celebrities who I thought were funny. And their tweets were funny and it made me feel good to read them. And then one of them REPLIED to one of my tweets and

well, duh. Obsession took over.

I mean, come on:

(read from the bottom up, n00bs)

I don't even personally know these people. They have no idea I exist. And a TWILIGHT reference?! How can something as little as that bring me joy?!

It just does. And if it brings me joy, I don't question it. A little bit of happiness goes a long way.

And with my weekend coming to an end, as the house empties, and as I face another long week of self doubt, uncertainty and stress...

trust me. That bit of happiness may not seem like much, but it was just the spark I needed.

Ugh. Eff you, Twitter...*creepy whisper* Ailurveyoo...

PS: I felt the need to clarify that I don't like Twilight, I just like that the people I like use it to make fun of each other. Are we clear? Me no likey the sparkly vampire? Ok. Luv ya, bye.

It's almost 5am.

2010-09-27T04:44:00.005+08:00

I had a dream about Phil, but...yeaaaah I don't wanna share that with you. *cough*

How bout this instead?

TEEHEE.

I'd Make A Horrible Werewolf.

2010-09-26T13:17:00.003+08:00

WEIRD DREAM POST!

I actually don't know when I had this one. I completely forgot about it until a few minutes ago- I was scrolling through my notes on my phone, and there was one labeled "Potter", and it detailed the dream. I don't think I can remember all the details, because what I do remember, based on the notes, makes it a really short dream.

But here goes.

I'm onstage, and as I look around me at all the people doing their thang, I instantly know that I'm part of the rehearsals for 'A Very Potter Musical'.

Awww yeaaaaaah.
Opportunity to stalk the Starkids.

But they take no notice of me until I start walking towards some random person, and he starts calling me Lupin.

Whuuuut.

But I go with it, because hey. I like where I'm at. They can call me whatever they want. So I turn towards this random person to ask about why he's calling me Lupin, and I realize....it's Daniel Radcliffe. He's staring right at me.

And I don't remember how or why, but apparently we're best buds, and so there I am, hanging out with DanRad, when suddenly...

Tom Felton walks up to say hi.

Whuuuut.

But I go with it. I grab his arm and turn him away from DanRad, and as we're walking away I'm whispering to him "Hey. Felton. Do you know any good, English insults (whuuuuut) that I can throw at DanRad?"

And then he gets all excited, says "Sure thing, Lupin!" and we run off together to plot some mischief.

THE END.

Bitter Smiley Betty

2010-09-25T20:43:00.003+08:00

I have no means to go to the Paramore concert.

No time. No money.

Ohhhh but I want to.

Proof can be found on this very blog that I was squeeing over them before they were big over here.

And people who happen to only like them after 'The Only Exception' (albeit aggressively) are going and they are rubbing it in my face.

Not sayin' they shouldn't go- they have every right.
Not sayin' they don't deserve it- because who can judge that, right?

but

FFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

Ruh-roh.

2010-09-21T14:45:00.005+08:00

Hm, falling back into a pattern, I see. I feel bad for not updating as often, but I'd feel even worse if anybody was actually reading, haha.

Ramadhan and Raya has come and gone, hope everyone enjoyed their holidays.

Everytime it's time to balik kampung, there's a mixture of emotions- trepidation and excitement- but it always ends up being better than I expect. Same with this year's Raya celebrations.

Oh, and I accidentally matched my baju raya with the curtains. And the carpet. Yay for me, the butt of jokes on Raya morning. :p

Nothing much to report besides that, really. My life has revolved around my thesis for the past 2 years (shit, it really has been that long, FML), and I don't feel any smarter or happier.

Let's just leave it at that before I rain on everyone's parade.

(Coincidence- I just heard a crack of ~~lightning~~ thunder from outside just as I finished typing out that sentence. Interesting. And a little creepy.)

I can't sleep, so I'm drinking coffee.

2010-09-06T00:09:00.010+08:00

Makes perfect sense.

Also,

Harry Potter, Voldemort/Umbridge, Ron Weasley and Snape.

Best casting EVAR. Just sayin'.

And these sexy beasts all made THE LIST, in case you were wondering. Actually, the ENTIRE cast made THE LIST. I'm talking guys, girls, extras, writers, whatever. Whoever was a part of it made the effing LIST because 'A Very Potter Musical' and everything that came/comes from Team Starkid pwns all.

You know...'THE LIST' sounds kinda psychotic. Like I'm planning to kill all of them at an undisclosed time.

Instead of it being a record of all the people I want to know everything about and occasionally just stare at while life passes me by.

Because that's not psychotic at all.

*cough*

It's JAKE! But not really.

2010-09-04T10:20:00.002+08:00

WEIRD DREAM POST!

(But if you don't know who these people are

[s]

you probably won't appreciate it as much as I do.)

I'm in Singapore, where my parents are welcoming me home. But then I realize that they're in formal wear, so I ask them what's up with that (I mean, I'm not that special...)

and they tell me "Oh, a couple of people are here too- you should meet them! Maybe they can help you with your thesis!"

and I'm like "uhhhh..."

but they take me around the house and start pointing out random people, and yelling at me when I don't know who they are (apparently they are very famous in my dream-academic world), and it doesn't take me long to get fed up with all the randomness, so I go out the door with my parents chasing after me and I'm feeling guilty, so I turn around, and Shirley from Community is there. With my parents. As if she was there all along.

So after an initial moment of 'wtf'-ness, I decide to just run with it, and start walking towards Cold Storage.

Walking...walking...(with my parents and Shirley walking behind me)...walking...

And suddenly I see a huge green pumpkin walking towards me, and I happen to be right in front of a crowded cafe, and I don't want to be associated with a giant walking pumpkin. Who is green. Not orange. GREEN. So I begin to turn away, but suddenly the pumpkin's calling out my name, and I realize it's Jeff/Joel. And he looks perfectly content as a green pumpkin, and he starts grinning at me, and really, who could resist that grin?

As I'm grinning back, Britta comes running up behind him, and apparently she and I are bff's, because we start hugging and laughing, and Jeff/Joel is just there grinning at me, being all adorable and...green...pumpkin-y.

But then my parents and Shirley come running up behind me, and my mother pushes Britta out of the way and stands right in front of Jeff/Joel and asks me "Who is this? Your boyfriend? Why is he here? WHO IS HE?"

and I get so flustered I say

"Ma, this is..this is..arrrghhh I don't know his name!!!!"

and then I push my parents into the cafe, where they're swallowed up by the crowd, and just when I'm feeling relieved, Britta stands by the door of the cafe and bellows:

"IT'S JAKE!!! I KNOW HIM!!! HIS NAME IS JAKE!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA!!!!"

...The End.

Close To Tears

2010-08-30T20:45:00.008+08:00

Oh man.

Oh maaaaan. It's just one of those random moments, where you see something, and it's like

"Fuck. I miss those times. Shouldn't have taken them for granted."

And I know I just cussed, but maybe it's partly because of Ramadhan that you start re-evaluating what you've done in your life, and how much of it was (is?) made up of so many happy memories.

What brought this on..well. You should know I don't look to the past often. But there's something about going to college that bears the kind of memories that'll stay with you forever- and it's universal, ain't it?

If you're not following me on Tumblr, then you have no idea how obsessive I've been over a group of people called the Starkids (I shouldn't even be prone to obsessive behaviour in the holy month- so FAIL, 'boo' me). So I've been stalking them. As non-creepily as I can manage, thank you very much. And not feeling bad about it. Because I've never stalked a whole bunch of people before; the most I've stalked have been in the same band.

But they're different. This time I'm stalking a bunch of theater kids (well, most of them have graduated, but still- theater kids for life, I'm bettin'...)

And ok, fine, yes yes, I have the hots for an insanely good-looking member of the team who is awesome at just about everything and is currently at the top of THE LIST, but that's besides the point. *cough*

But after watching THIS video...

now I can't see any pictures of them, or watch any videos of them rehearsing without feeling that pang of sadness.

Because I'm watching what my life used to be made of (um...minus the drinking. On MY part at least, haha). Late night rehearsals...hanging out in groups AFTER rehearsals, refusing to go to bed because hell, it's still 'early'. Making stupidly awesome videos of 'behind the scenes' stuff. The jitters before showtime. The excitement of being backstage. The hard work, the payoff.

All those people hatin' on our course WISHED they could have had as much fun as we did in getting our degrees, HAH.

And sure, there was just as much drama offstage as there was onstage (understatement), but that doesn't automatically erase all the fun we had.

Oh man.

Don't cry.

"Try: Super Mega Foxy Awesome Hot!"

2010-08-22T16:44:00.003+08:00

My anxiety over the new Potter movie has grown in recent months.

I.
CANNOT.
WAIT.

Will I celebrate the end of my thesis by watching it?

....meh, I'll watch it anyway, regardless.

So for now I've just been re-reading all the books

-ok I'm lying Stepehn Fry does the reading for me and I just listen-

and watching 'A Very Potter Musical' again and again and again.

Not only because of

but because it is generally one of the more awesome things in life that you have the opportunity to see.

but also

Teehee.

Feeling Like A Bridge Troll.

2010-08-06T21:51:00.002+08:00

How bout I show you what I look like right now, so you can have a sense of how I'm feeling about having to pull an all-nighter tonight?

That's coffee, by the way.

It's not working.

Cats Everywhere.

2010-08-04T21:34:00.004+08:00

This is Raisin. Also known as Mufasa.

She's not afraid of people (unlike my two cowardly ones at home). In fact, she's quite comfortable with humans.

Very, very comfortable.

This is Tam-Tam. Also known as The Clinger.

He has to wear a collar so he doesn't nibble on his coat until he goes bald. I call him Tam Handsome- because the pattern of his fur makes it look like he's always wearing a suit and tie.

This is Muffin. Also known as Gollum.

She'll challenge you to a staring contest, and she'll win every time. My brother insists she's mentally retarded, but she's just an overgrown kitten.

Oh, and they all have a foot fetish. They like to sniff people's feet, and not in the normal 'hey-I'm-a-cat-let-me-sniff-your-feet' kinda way.

In the 'ZOMG-FEET-GIMME!' way.

Welcome, Welcome!

2010-08-01T11:19:00.006+08:00

Everyone, meet

Baby Seri! (pronounced like the actual BM word, or the Western equivalent 'Cerie' or 'suh-ree', although it's alright to pronounce it 'sreee' because most people will anyway)

And that's really all I have time for right now- more details later!

....have a nice day?

*rushes off*

This doesn't count as a new post.

2010-07-22T14:24:00.007+08:00

It's more of an 'in-between posts' kind of post.

Only because they told me I had to change my template before Friday. Random. And after a false alarm and still waiting for the baby to arrive, I have time on my hands (if you ignore the mountain of books I have to get to, collecting dust in my house where right now, only 2 overweight cats live).

And since she requested it:

Enjoy the power of pillow-cat, K. Shan! :p

So, new layout. Narcissism in play with the header, sure. But it's MY blog, and what better way to customize something than to plaster my mug all over it? Pwned, blog. PWNED.

You wanna see the closest thing I have to porn on my laptop?

Relax, it's mild.

The video, I mean.

Not the thoughts running through my head as I watch it. Epitome of filth, those are.

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaanyway.

OH NOOOOOOOO!

2010-07-13T18:52:00.003+08:00

...it's nothing really.

Just missed the drama. Meh hehehehehehee (that was my sleazy laugh).

My internet hates me, my thesis hates me, my supervisor hates me

THE WHOLE FREAKING UNIVERSE IS WORKING AGAINST ME!

...oh, there's the drama.

Teehee!

P.S I'm thinking my next post will be pictures of my newborn niece.

That, or Jake.

Or maybe just random pics of my cats.

Unless I have another weird dream.

I should just stop here.

HDU, Twilight. Invading my sleep?! Eff you.

2010-07-03T18:31:00.004+08:00

WEIRD DREAM POST!

I'm on a school bus- destination? Unknown.

But Sha (my ex-roommate) is sitting next to me, and she's just staring at me.

I proceed to be creeped out.

She looks like she's about to say something, but she's holding it in for some reason...but then she finally breaks- she grabs me and says:

"OH.MY.GOD. JACOB?!?!?! JACOB. JACOB!!!!"

-and I'm like "What the f-...."

BUT THEN!

The bus stops and we all get out, and people are chanting:

'Jacob, Jacob, Jacob...'

and there are Taylor Lautner cardboard cutouts as far as the eye can see.

This predicament would have had me screaming in real life, but dream-me is a little more classy.

Oh yes.

What did I do?

I started chanting: "Jacob, Benjamin. Jacob, Benjamin. JACOB, BENJAMIN!!!!!" (um, in case you didn't know, Jake Gyllenhaal's full name is Jacob Benjamin Gyllenhaal...)

and I whip out a cardboard cutout of the Prince of Persia from...I don't really know where. I just had it handy, I suppose.

THE END.

Woah- Uh Oh- Huh

2010-06-28T22:04:00.001+08:00

My new niece is due in 2 weeks!

O_o'

Let's See How Long It Lasts.

2010-06-21T01:31:00.003+08:00

Since the last post was a mommy one, I'm making this one a daddy post! Technically I'm a day behind, but HAPPY FATHER'S DAY!

Just wanted to share a tidbit that brought on the LOLz this morning.

So the pic of Jake below, wearing that ridiculous albeit amazing t-shirt has been my desktop background since I ~~stole~~ found it. Because I like for him to be the first thing I see when I power up the ol' laptop. Shut up.

So this particular father's day morning, I'm just staring happily at my desktop picture (I may or may not have been drooling- besides the point) and my dad comes over and hovers, the way dads do.

Then he asks me if it's a pic of my boyfriend.

He asks me. If the super famous actor. Jake Gyllenhaal. Is my boyfriend.

What the hell was I supposed to say?

Well...yes. I said yes.

And he believed me.

Which means my dad is awesome.

Jack Nasty loves you.

Cool shirt, dude.

2010-06-18T20:51:00.004+08:00

Admit it now. That's cute, right? Not to mention hilarious.

That was just to make this post a little less depressing.

So I finally talked to my mother about what I saw for myself further down the line, and how it seemed to be perpetually dark.

And her first reaction totally made me feel like crap.

But then she calmed down...

and told me she knows I can do anything and that I'll certainly do it well, and (basically) to tell the world to SUCK IT if it thought it could bring me down.

And then I realized that her first reaction was important, because me thinking like I did disappointed her.

And I don't want to disappoint her or anyone else.

:)

DAMMIT JAKE, STOP BEING SO GODDAMN FOINE!

Why I Like The FIFA World Cup

2010-06-13T23:26:00.003+08:00

Cady: Yeah, I like math.
Damian: Eww. Why?
Cady: Because it's the same in every country.
Damian: That's beautiful. This girl is deep.

Now, replace "math" with "World Cup", 'Cady' with 'Me', and Damien with 'Whoever asks'.

It's not perfect, but I'm sleepy.

Take My Word For It.

2010-06-09T22:19:00.003+08:00

I'm not a bad student.

I was never the perfect student, but I wasn't bad. In terms of general behavior and also work ethic. Meaning no matter how difficult the assignment was, how much of a butt-sore your groupmates were and how close I was to losing my mind, I always wanted to do my best and have the end result reflect just that.

All my friends are the same, because you know what? If they DIDN'T want to do the work to the best of their ability, I COULDN'T consider them friends. Complain, whine, procrastinate to the very last minute- hell, I do that, for sure. But don't just half-ass it and expect other people to pick up your slack. 'Coz then me no likey you.

So right now, I resent the fact that I am putting out vibes that I am NOT a good student. That I DON'T want to do my best.

Because I AM, and I DO.

Whatever you may think of me, I can probably understand the reasons behind it. But what if I know that what you think of me is in no way...well...'me'? Also, you're not perfect either. So HAH.

(*Pause* to marinate chicken for tomorrow's lunch)

Life gets in the way sometimes, and priorities shift places on your list of 'CRAP I HAVE TO DO'.

So. NOW my problem is:

I can write it.

But I can't say it to the person who needs to hear it.

Fear? Sure.
Shame? Uh-huh.

All that good stuff that just feels like a knife to the kidneys.

Awesome. (..she said, while bleeding to death.)

Henry, YOU BEYOTCH.

2010-06-03T11:32:00.004+08:00

WEIRD DREAM POST!

I'm sitting in the living room with a bunch of people, and we're having a grand old time, when suddenly I hear yelling from outside...

So I open the door and apparently I've been living smack dab in the middle of a forest, and yonder, over the hill, me sees a damn cavalry heading towards me!

Suddenly arrows are flying through the air!

The ground shakes from the impact of cannon balls!

Smoke, everywhere!

King Henry VIII (JRM/Rape eyes) riding past on his horse, yelling obscenities while magically not getting hit by anything!

And what do I do?!

....hide behind a giant tree, of course.

Duh.

And not once did I see Charles Brandon, Duke of Suffolk. DAMNIT.

THE END.

I'm a twit...ter...er?

2010-06-01T18:29:00.003+08:00

And I happen to really like my layout. Haha.

...I wonder if you can spot the red guitar?...

THE ULTIMATE.

2010-06-01T15:34:00.003+08:00

I'm on a break so let's DO THIS THANG.

WEIRD DREAM POST!

And man, this is the Matty Nay dream I've been waiting for. Um....the clean version. HAHAHAHAAAAA. *cough* Haha.

Aaaanyway.

I'm in a school, and the hallways are empty, but I can hear the distant sound of laughter and music. And so I follow it down a creepy-ass corridor, and come to a door, and it looks like it might open up into an auditorium or something. I open it and it's completely dark..and I barely have enough time to be scared when someone grabs my arm and leads me to the front of the stage, front row seat.

I look up, and holy crap, there he is. Being all perfect and singing. I don't even know what he's singing, but he's singing, being all perfect. I'm so entranced by him, he goes through an entire set list before I realize: "Waitaminute, what the hell is he doing here in the first place?"

(Also, after every song, someone backstage plays Christina Aguilera's "Genie In A Bottle."

Weird.)

So the show's over, and everyone's getting out of their seats, but I'm panicking, because I figure it's not enough time to formulate a plan on how to meet him.

But I didn't have to worry.

I finally get my feet to move, and I'm walking towards the door when someone says "Hey, let me take a picture! Come on! Hurry!" I turn around and there he is, surrounded by people, but then he sees me and says "Hey, here! Picture!" and gives me that smirk of his. (*dies*)

So I push the other bitches outta the way to get to him and omg, there I am, hugging his waist, and he puts his arms around me jokingly-

and out of ALL the things that I could be thinking, my mind chooses to ponder "Why is his waist so small?"

and out of ALL the things that I could have said out loud, my mouth decides to shoot out "I'm sorry I'm so short."

Some random person snaps the picture.

He hugs me one last time.

Dude, I can practically smell him.

Lucid dreams, FTMFW.

THE END.

So, so happy.

*tear*

Hate Haters.

2010-05-30T17:34:00.007+08:00

This has been the first weekend in a while where I really had time for ME, and I intend to use that to my advantage by just vegetating around the house, and not just because I'm exhausted, like the other times, oh no. It's for the best reason evah- I've got nothing else I have to do. (Well, that's not completely true- but more true than for most days, how bout that? Hehe.) Yay me.

And to Miss Nuri and Miss Ami, I haven't forgotten about that coffee date, I'mma make it happen! There has to be one weekend where the universe aligns for us and we can get high on caffeine and do stupid stuff together, muahahahaa.

~~~~~

And now, we enter the American Idol segment.
That's right.
I'm not done with it yet.
I know I said I was.
But I'm not.
Because I lied.
And because videos are popping up all over YouTube like some sort of weird American-Idol vomit that you can't clean up no matter how hard you try.

I love Lee Dewyze. I've never actually said it, because I wasn't sure, but thanks to the YouTube Idol vomit (I'm starting to regret that analogy now), I can say it. (Or type it. Whatever.) And obviously, he's made THE LIST. Muahahahaa.

I get that people wanted Crystal to win, and in the long run, I would've been OK with her winning (after the initial disappointment, of course). And I don't mind in the least when people tell me that they wanted Crystal to win because they love her voice, she's talented, or that they don't like Lee's voice, his style of music.Those are ALL valid reasons!

But when you give me dumbass reasons as to why you think he should'nt have won, you place yourself on my shit list.

"He cheated!" : What?! Just..go away. Right now.
"He doesn't deserve it!" : Right. Because Crystal and the others worked so much harder than him? Pshh.
"He's just copying David Cook!" (and other DC related comparisons) : OMG, just STFU, GTFO and DIAF, thank you. Get over yourselves.
"He has no personality!" : I guess this one could be valid, seeing as people's opinions of 'a good personality' vary. But unlike the valid reasons stated earlier which are acceptable to me, this one is very borderline. I don't understand how people could think he's a 'bad' guy. Really? What has he done/said to warrant it? Come on, now.
...and then there's one more dumbass argument that was actually voiced out to me, but it's just so stupid, I won't even state it here. Seriously. It takes the cake with its dumbass-ery.

Tak tau la kan, if he's just putting on an act. If he is, he's got me fooled completely. I get a strange kind of joy from watching him be overwhelmed by everything. Kinda sick to be happy when you see someone break down and cry in the middle of a song....but what are ya gonna do. =)

That's my two cents.

I Hate To Love You, AI.

2010-05-28T10:50:00.004+08:00

Season 9.

Oh, Season 9.

You tried my patience. You made me give up hope. You made me not care.

....But still, I came back to you. Muahahahaha.

Finale was great, I don't get all the hate (ooooh looky there, I made with the rhyme).

LEE DEWYZE, BITCHES!

And my 'Red Guitar' theory still holds true. Thank you, Kris Allen's guitarist:

So, another season over, time to hang up my 'deranged idol fan' hat. Next year...well. We'll see if, with Simon's absence, they give me a reason to wipe the dust off that hat when the time comes.

Time to get you that red guitar, Lee.

I Hide Depression Well.

2010-05-25T21:29:00.005+08:00

Too. Many. TV shows. Ending. At. The. Same. Time.

I'm going to be writing my thesis until I'm 40. Assuming I can still afford to pay the fees. Sorry, supervisor. If you hate me, you hate me. Hope she doesn't assume I'm doing it on purpose, because that would suck. Maybe she could give me some tips on how to keep up the balancing act? I'm obviously failing at trying.

Dumbass people are EVERYWHERE and all up in my space.

Liz Lemon/Tina Fey from 30 Rock is my heroine/heroin (not a typo). That's bad. But she has a killer wardrobe.

Parents may be staying in Lionpore a while longer. More time than any of us want.

....and this one is a long overdue rant, but why wouldn't UIA accept me into Mass Communications?! Bitches! ...then again, BENL is pretty damn awesome, muahahahaa. So thanks, bitches.

Why is everyone going someplace?

Whatever. I'm going to ease the pain by giving in to my chicken addiction. But things better look up soon, or I'm going to be 300 kilos in the near future.

That's SO Gay.

2010-05-11T17:14:00.009+08:00

It's a strange coincidence that the last 3 movies I've watched centered on (or included) homosexual relationships.

They were all quite depressing.

And brilliant.

This particular poster had me worried- it looks like another one of those chick flicks, right? But the dialogue is clever enough that you can't help falling in love with it. Gotta love that British humour. If for nothing else, watch it to scrutinize Piper Perabo's English accent. She's adorable. Sure it has its cliched moments, but I don't know how else to explain it- it's just so very...charming. And put together so well.

Aaah. For the literature lovers, I suppose. ;)

Visually beautiful. I can't even do it any justice by attempting to describe it here, you're going to have to watch it yourself. Stunning. And what kind of sick bastard are you if you don't like Colin Firth? Pshhh.

Now that I'm not suffering from feverish delusions anymore and only have to go through my days with a sea of phlegm threatening to escape through all available orifices (I know, 'ew'), (which unfortunately also means having to clear my throat every time I speak to anyone for fear they may think I'm a transsexual- extra phleghm makes me sound like James Earl Jones)..I get to concentrate on my paper now.

BALLS.

It's Goode To Be Sick.

2010-05-06T18:32:00.005+08:00

So I've been bedridden since Sunday.

It's horrible, but also...quite relaxing. Aside from feeling as if your muscles have abandoned their duties, alternating from burning hot to freezing cold in the span of seconds, having to go through a million tissues (killing hundreds of trees in the process) all while trying to remember to take your medication when you don't even know what day or time it is....

I get to sit in bed with my laptop and watch movies/episodes of tv series and just fry all my brain cells for the week.

Today's "Fry Your Brain Cells" program consisted of a movie marathon. A Matthew Goode movie marathon.

Ahhh. So...English.

And he deserves special mention because he was on THE LIST before I even made THE LIST. Proof: clicky click.

Movie List:

Imagine Me & You (2005)
Brideshead Revisited (2008)
A Single Man (2009)
Leap Year (2010)

....uh-oh.
Can't. Seem to want. To type anything. More.
Lost focus.
Need medicine.

:(

Let Me Take You To The Moooo-vies, Shor-tay!

2010-05-02T11:37:00.006+08:00

As luck would have it, my trip to Johor was canceled.

Damn you, H1N1. (No, I don't have it, but..well, people should be damning it anyway, right? Just doing my part.)

So I miss out on fun and witnessing the joining of two lives. :( Cappy, may you love your new sister forever (hehe), and may your baby brother's marriage be a long and happy one! Congratulations! *hugs* And I'm working on getting you a Nick Carter for your wedding.

In other news, I watched Iron Man 2 last night.

I don't understand why it got such bad reviews. I'm guessing it's because some people went in geared up for non-stop action; in that case they might have been under the impression that something was lacking.

But I loved it. They upped the witty banter, and that's all good to me. Tony Stark. What a prick. Gotta love him.

...It doesn't bode well for me that I find the douchiness of TS/RDJ an attractive quality, but hey. The heart wants what it wants. Haha. (Please God, nodouchesinmyfuturethankyouamin.)

I think stress has been affecting my dreams...in that I haven't been having any. And I miss waking up to a resounding "WTF was THAT?!". It made my mundane life interesting. *sigh*

Should I at least take comfort in the fact that what I see before I fall asleep has been constant for the past week or so?

Aaah. There it is. Red guitar. WIN.

And CANADA wins AGAIN.

2010-04-27T18:07:00.002+08:00

The guitarist who whipped out the red guitar.

I love you, Cory. And he passed by us, was literally like a metre away to our right, but I realized that too late- I was watching him for like the first 10 seconds of his walk down to our level, thinking

"Wait, that guy looks familiar. Why do I feel like I know him? Did I go to school with him? Wait, I know him, I know I do..."

and then he walked out of sight and it hit me, and then I thought

"FUCK. Guitarist. Hot. Kelly. Band. FUCK."

Part II: Audio/Visual Aid

2010-04-26T20:02:00.005+08:00

Very sweaty by the end of it all.

F-Bombs Are Needed. Really.

2010-04-26T07:11:00.009+08:00

FUCKING. FLAWLESS.

I have yet to sleep since the concert ended, but it was worth it. Very much so.

Bow down to the motherFUCKING QUEEN!

She sang songs from every album

PLUS

all her usual covers (That I Would Be Good/Use Somebody made me lose my shit)

PLUS

a couple of bonus covers

PLUS

WE MADE IT ON THE BIG SCREEN MORE THAN ONCE, HAHAHAHHAAAAA

PLUS

.......her band is just FUCKING AWESOME.

Oh, Oh! PLUS! Natalie from Hitz was giving out free posters by throwing them into the crowd and I caught one, muahahahhahaaaa!

...ok fine, it bounced off the person behind me and landed in my hand.

Still counts.

Oh, OH! PLUS! A RED GUITAR made an appearance in the hands of her very foine guitarist! Her entire band was good-looking, it's ridiculous. But then I guess she fits right in, and don't you say otherwise, you haters.

PLUS, we sang her Happy Birthday, and she said she'd never had an audience sing her Happy Birthday before. BOO-YAH, rest of the world. Eat it. Malaysia Rules.

She said she enjoyed sweating herself to death onstage for us.

I love her. Waiting 9 years for this was totally worth it, no doubt.

Fun Fact: I yelled out "I WANT YOUR PICK, HOT GUITARIST!"

[Thank you Cappy Carter for making it possible and being my partner in crime. I guess now we wait for The JoBros to come around so I can yell obscenities at Joe from afar.]